Nice background and review here, and some serious foreboding as well. Looks like Kim is starting to realize that there are bigger things in the world, and it seems like it scares her a little bit. The big question is, are things around her life being manipulated for a reason, and what would that reason be?
Her dream/vision is going to be a key to something in the near future, isn't it?
Glad to see an update for this, and looking forward to the next one...
Oh yeah, Kim's really the mess right now. It's like she's holding on to Ron as if he was a lifeline of some desperation for her heart, and this is a bit unsettling to her for some reason. She has such love in her heart for him, but its very early in the relationship, isn't it? Meanwhile, Ron is confident about the future they both will have together, but he should be careful of complacency with Kim and Rich's nearness to her.
I hope their new 2nd in command isn't a quiet infiltration of Kim's heart after all. Nothing bad, but something that could break her heart and leave Ron with something that he cannot fully be a part of in the end. No one's fault, but still getting back to the fall of Camelot all over again...
You need to locate some of the videos of the series to get a better appreciation of Ron Stoppable. He does goof around and is lucky (dumb skills) at times, but he always is there for his Kim. Her confidence & success and his stepping up are directly linked. Diminishing his presence or worth is very counter productive to his and Kim's dynamic, either as a team or as soulmates.
I liked this story till now. Its more of a general dislike than anything in your writing style, which I rather admire. I have a problem with OCs playing prominent roles in fanfics, especially in a KP fanfic. To me, Rich seemed too much of a Gary-Stue, and it just didn't feel natural when Kim invited them into the team and gave Richard 'second in command'. Ron isn't that incompetent, after he has the potential of a successful evil genius(Zorpox rules!). Also, Kim's little 'knight in armor' vision seemed more out of place with everything else. I seriously went O_o.
I'm sorry if this came out harsher than I intended, its just that self-insertions really get on my nerve, and Richard Sirois' Lionheart and his fan-art especially set my blood boiling when I first came upon it. Why, you ask. Because he triviliazed KP and Ron's realtionship by inserting an OC as a third wheel and giving him equal importance in the duo's dynamic. Its just seemed wrong-sick.
After reading this chapter, one thought popped into my head. "Growth can be a painful thing." When Kim gets through all this (with Ron's help), she will be even stronger than ever.
This chapter has built the relationship between Team Possible and Team Harte very well. Something tells me that later in the story this relationship will be tested.
Oy such the soap opera! Kim is such a mess, Ron is really hiding his fears, doubts and pain from the recent years through now, and they really aren't meshing well with all the additions, distractions and add-ons to their lives. Now in a critical time of their lives, the threat of distance is about to come upon them.
Why does this feel like Guenevere/Lancelot all over again?
Certainly the start of something great if it stars two of the most popular redheads out there. You know who I mean. KP and Mary Jane. Guess I'll find out the answer to my unasked question of how'll Spidey make his appearance into this when it happens. It's a good start and I look forward to the whole thing from start to finish.
If Mary Jane is harboring such strong feelings, then why is she doing this? And I'm surprised that the in-depth analysis that retrieved her information didn't catch anything about Ron's MMP. Or does he not have it in this story?
Certainly hope this was not intended as a recruiting piece for superheroes. Excellent observations both in Mary Jane's paper and the brief analysis of Team Possible. The long term progniosis reminds me of the aviator's mantra. There are old pilots and bold pilots, but seldom an old, bold pilot.
Quite the darkness awaits Kim, Ron and the gang, if this is their destiny. With Ron back home, will Kim be ok in NYC? And keep Rich away from the girl...
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