Reviews for Secret Smiles - FanFiction.Net

Reviews For: Secret Smiles

Pyromaniac-Girl 2007-12-09 ch 2,	abuseThis has been a very good story so far!! I am eager to read what happens next!! Please write more soon!! Have a good day!!
fussyrussy 2006-10-01 ch 2,	abusewell done keep writing this story
No Sneezing 2005-12-13 ch 2,	abuseI really like your story. Please continue with it!! I wonder if the sphinx reappears in the future... one can only hope. I can't wait to see where you're going with this story!! (And why it's called "Secret Smiles"... I guess it's one of those stories like this really good story called "Frequent Falling" where you don't really get the title at first. I guess...) ~Hugs from No Sneezing
Jagged Epiphany 2005-12-13 ch 2,	abuseGood follow up chapter. I'm glad he gave her the sphinx. I love Ancient Egyptian stuff, too. And the other couples you're going to include are my faves as well! How'd you know? Now, I just can't resist getting into the Mary Sue debate. First, Mary Sues don't always have to be made up. It's just more common with OCs. Hermione can turn into a Mary Sue in some fanfics if she isn't handled properly. Since Alicia is a minor character you do need to give her traits, but she needs to have bad traits too. Anyway, it's a pretty fine line. And just so you know I'm not being condescending, I went through a similar thing. I know how you feel. Someone pointed out Alicia was Mary Sueish in my story 'Old Faces'. I couldn't see it at first, then I took a closer look at her. In the end I began to develop both sides of her a little more and it completely revived the story. It ended up with over one thousand reviews, so I'm glad I fixed it. The bottom line is that it's your story and you can do what you want with it. I honestly think you have enough natural talent to pull this off. Some of your phrasing is really striking. You also do the twins really well! I almost forgot to mention that. They're not as easy to get hold of as they might seem. ~J.E. P.S. Feel free to reply straight to this review if you want to say something about what I mentioned.
iLUVmichi 2005-12-13 ch 2,	abusethis story just keeps getting better and better...i cant wait for the next chapter, though...as you already know...i love Fred/Angelina moments...as much as George/Alicia moments...i dont why they're not popular...i love them both...my favorite couples! anyways...i think this review's gone on long enough...update soon...until then...BYE!
Bardlover 2005-12-13 ch 2,	abuseAww, you put my name in. Thanks. I have no idea why George/Alicia is so unpopular. Poor George. I plan to write one myself. However, I must finish my Ron/Hermione first. Trying to put Lupin/Tonks in eh? Good stuff. Oh, and yes, I did enjoy the Ron/Hermione. Update!
Taste of Cinnamon 2005-12-12 ch 2,	abuseIntresting. I love the take on Fred/George's lives. The only bit I dont much like is the fact that you've made Alica an animagus. Because that tends to lead to Mary Sue-ness and...yeah. It just seems everyone's an animagus nowadays. But otherwise fantastic work and update soon! -ToC
Harry Lvr 2005-12-10 ch 1, anon.	abuseHmm...not bad. There's no need to write 'flashback' in many cases if you have a good enough lead it - don't feel pressured to write it if you feel you don't need it. Try not to make Alicia so mary-sueish (her description was extremely like a mary sue, no offence). Just picture her as one of your friends and write how you would write about them. People generally enjoy stories more if they can relate to the characters, and I dunno about you but there's no way in hell I can relate to someone described as 'a vision of a goddess'. So basically, make the characters more realistic and don't underestimate the intelligence of your audience. We can pick up who likes who without you needing to make it obvious.
Bardlover 2005-12-08 ch 1,	abuseI did enjoy this first chapter. I love George/Alicia fics. Plus this one also has Fred/Angelina and my personal fav Ron/Hermione. With Lupin/Tonks it could be even better. hint hint
Sir Fuzzalot 2005-12-08 ch 1,	abuseYay! I really like this one!! I absolutely LOVED the chaos earlier on, and how Alicia walked in then. Very well written. I can't wait for your next update!! (Hey!! This is kinda like my story in how Alicia was gone, and then she comes back :) ) I am anxious to see how you make this story turn out!! Sir Fuzzatot er... Sir Fuzzalot P.S. Give Alicia the Sphinx!!
iLUVmichi 2005-12-08 ch 1,	abusei LOVE it!! please continue...and please add more FWAJ...i just love them...cant wait for the update...until then...BYE!
Jagged Epiphany 2005-12-08 ch 1,	abuseYou did very well! Good to have another George/Alicia writer around the place. The chapter was really good and I'm looking forward to more. ~J.E.
pinocchio 2005-12-07 ch 1,	abusegreat first chapter, update soon

Return to Top