First off, given how long your account seems to have been idle, I'm guessing that there's no chance you are still writing fanfiction at all, and there's a damn good chance that you won't even receive this review. Under these circumstances, I'd normally not bother writing one, but this story is rather conceptually brilliant and I'd love to see more of it.

I'll start by saying that normally I cannot stand the standard Ranma goes to the past and tries to fix everything time-travel fics. While I like the general idea of a character having foreknowledge, for some reason, most people cannot make it work right in the Ranma-verse. I believe you said it well in the intro to the story, that no one has written a selfish Ranma in this trope. I'd go so far as to say that no one has even written a convincingly assertive Ranma either. While there are infinitely more poorly written Harry potter fics in the time-travel trope, there are so many more of them, that at least a few are decent, in as much as the protagonist actually grows a spine.

Because of that, I've really enjoyed this story, enough so to break my self-imposed rule of not posting a review to authors who seem to have retired. You've written your Ranma to be rather eloquent, proactive and completely manipulative. It is so insanely OOC that it would seem completely anathema to his canon character, and that makes this story worth reading. I particularly enjoy that you managed to justify his newfound attitude and behavior. I'm a firm believer that after the Ranma canon ends, he snaps one way or the other, and refuses to marry anyone from Nerima, choosing instead to get his own life. I happen to like your method for doing that, and I've always wanted to read a good time travel fic in the Ranma-verse where Ranma actually looks out for himself.

I also happen to like Mara, she's a fun, if somewhat sidelined character.

All in all, I've no delusions that this story is active, but I wanted to compliment it anyway. If you don't have any intention to return to the fanfiction writing world, I'd love to see someone pick this fic up and see where it goes. Actually, if you even had an outline of general events for where you were planning on taking this, I'd love to see it posted as an addendum. In fact, the only problem I can see so far is that there isn't any real challenge for Ranma yet. He totally outclasses everyone else thusfar, and I'd like to see a little real conflict. That said, great job.

nice, very nice, hope you remember its existence.

this story rocks hard core in so many ways

his wish, "give the gods as rotten a day as ive had", that ought to be fun for the demons to watch, unless of course they get caught up in it. ciao

Will this be continued? It's a really good story...

Very enjoyable story and I hope you are able to come back and continue it at some point. Watching Ranma finally take a stand and challenge what everyone was pushing him into has been very entertaining. Wishing you and your family well as your story made me laugh, I wish to return the favor. Return good for good received.

Having just finished reading this story for the second time in as many days, I have to say that I really really like it, and hope that you get around to writing more of it soon.

I liked it so far. Are you ever going to update?

This is an awesome story I really hoep you update it has been a long time so I hope you update soon.

Aww a good story and you quit updating .

Chapter 2, cont…
first place, baka.-
[Unnecessary Japanese]

“And you expected Saotome to wait here for a week for you to find your way? You are a coward!”
[This works, I suppose, but it’s pretty harsh. I question whether Ranma would really chase away Ryouga, because annoying though he may be, he’s also one of the only semiconsistent challengers who can actually make him break a sweat]

hair-chopping baka
[Unnecessary Japanese]

“Ryoga, that jerk!” she yelled.
[I’ll admit, that’s damn funny]

This story is pretty good, but it seems like Ranma’s going overboard. Yes, I know his life was crap, and he’s uninhibited, but he’s going way farther than necessary to clear up problems. Giving up Ryouga (whom he implied repeatedly in the manga was a good sparring partner) is something I don’t think he’d do. I also want to point out that a lot of things – like ambition and sex drive – that were supposedly ‘unlocked’ have made no appearance. I know some might not be huge, but I’d expect to have seen at least one instance of him being distracted or laughing maniacally while others give him funny looks and his actions start alienating him.

Chapter 3
a good nights’ sleep.
[Number agreement: night’s]

I want to report a burglar in the area…His name is Hibiki
[I can tell that you don’t like Ryouga, but I don’t hate him and I think he’s already been dealt his death knell. This is beyond anything ‘necessary’ and edges towards character bashing]

Nabiki hated not getting her full eight hours of sleep. Stupid pig.
[That would’ve been funny if it hadn’t gone to overboard – yes, I confess part of it is that I like Ryouga (and don’t pretend to know the whole series, though Ranma has plenty of ‘sneaky bastard’ moments of his own), and ‘haters’ probably have no problem with this, but it seems excessive even for the neutral crowd]

-She’s vindictive. I like her.-
What’s vindictive mean? If it means evil, you’re right.
[There’s something appropriate about that]

“Sounds like something the Master would make a woman do.”
Genma slapped a hand over his friend’s mouth. “Speak not the name!” he insisted.
[I like the way you brought more elements of the future story in]

resulting in a ball of ki
[Why’s Ranma beating up Soun when Genma is the one who ** him off? I know there’s a degree of patriarch-bashing (and it’s not without cause), but Genma’s the only one to have hit the catalyst. Soun is just there, as far as you’ve told us]

this insistent desire of yours to engage me to Akane,
[Inconsistent: last you mentioned, Genma was fine with the engagement to Kasumi]

“Because mine’s been dead since I was six,” Ranma stated blandly,
[Given the scene, I think he’d snap or snarl]

until the fights almost over.
[fight’s]

“Too fast, too strong,
[Given the amount of Ranma-Akane banter, I think that a speech tag clearly identifying this as Nabiki (whom I think it is) would clarify the line]

(“RYOGA NO HENTAI!”)
[Unnecessary Japanese]

this girl body is the way to go. And I’m going to show you how.”
[That is so disturbing…and characteristic]

“Smurgly!” Kasumi said, or something like that, and blushed to the roots of her hair.
[Points +1]

-It’s a wonder she didn’t have a nervous breakdown, herself.-
[Sounds like she did]

Kasumi was like a background character, only speaking when spoken to. My honor kept me trapped. She was stuck there because it was the only life she could really remember.
[That is extremely creepy because it’s so probably true and so familiar]

I think you’re doing a little overmuch with Ryouga – and Ranma’s having too good a time – but I am fascinated by what you’re doing with the ‘lesser characters’ like Nabiki and particularly Kasumi. I would’ve liked to see Ryouga break out of his idiocy (Akane’s had her shot and, as I predicted, stayed in her own little world, quite true to what I think is her real character), but despite a few strains this story is remarkably good. Pity it hasn’t been updated in years.

Was cursing in such a manner manly?
[Why would he be cursing in English when Ranma doesn’t know English?]

Principal Kuno had lined the halls with fake palm trees. Random ones had motion-detecting pineapple mines in them.
[The others were so close together (I’d think it would make a good week summary) that they began to sound contrived. However, this is funny and relatively original]

It was hard to determine, like she was whatever age range she wanted you to think she was.
[There’s a lot of characters that fit in that range]

A hooker!
[Given that this is a continuation of the previous question, this should end with a question mark as well]

What kind of life exactly did he lead? Was his life filled with crazy people?
A dozen people in Japan and China promptly sneezed.
[Indeed]

Even is they’d
[Even _as_?]

before its up
[it’s]

THAT BAKA DOES!
[Unnecessary Japanese]

I send you back in time to when you arrived here, slightly changing your moral/ethical set to one less… hmm… shall we say, one less open to coercion and manipulation?”
[I note that she didn’t say he’d have the advantage of any memories of what happened, which could conceivably prepare him for some of the chaos that would come]

“…”
[Superfluous]

These people have got me so far into a corner, I can’t see the way out anymore!
[Funny how many times in life that’s the real problem]

Chakra two is blocked. I mean really blocked. Like someone was trying to shut it off.
[Small issue with this: it’s not canonically accurate. While Ranma’s probably got a ‘slow spot’ there, the manga makes it pretty clear in Shampoo’s introduction that he does have at least some drive (the flowers around the panel are an extremely common means of indicating love or simple lust), and he thinks about it in private a few times in canon]

(A/N For those who don’t know, the solar plexus is a dense cluster of nerve cells and supporting tissue, located behind the stomach just below the diaphragm. Hitting people here is good… if you want to hurt them. Don’t really go around hitting people here.)
[True though that may be, it’s also an author’s note mid-chapter-text, which is extremely bad form]

Ranma woke an hour later,
[Wouldn’t this be well after the time limit?]

“Ite…” Ranma groaned.
[Unnecessary Japanese]

a week ago, I thought that being in ‘love’ with someone meant that you liked them and wanted to protect them.
[I think there was more to it than that, but I do agree that was probably the primary bond and this isn’t exactly out-of-line given the story flow, which has been progressing relatively understandably]

Despite being incorporeal, Mara managed to facefault.
[Comical]

“WHY!” she screamed. “WHY DID YOU LET THIS HAPPEN TO ME!
[I can’t fathom what Ranma would have told Kasumi that would’ve made her become like this. It’s just so…out of character, without any catalyst or explanation]

Chapter 2
back to China, maybe keep Shampoo from getting on my back,
[I’d have thought he’d want to go back far enough to keep from being cursed if he’s going to go back that far, and I definitely wouldn’t have expected him to have thought of Shampoo with the slew of problems he’s got besides just her]

Don’t think too badly of Akane. She’s really a very sweet girl. She’s just a violent maniac.
[Kasumi’s line which will live in infamy]

What was that
[Interrogative missing its question mark]

It don’t matter-”
-Doesn’t matter.-
Shut up, I’m ranting here!
[Oh, that was good]

tried to walk passed them.
[past]

Not even waiting for Ranma to speak,
[I’m surprised Ranma hasn’t waltzed inside during the speech]

I invented the Squirrel Maneuver.”
[I’m not sure what this may have referred to at time of writing, but I thought of ‘Up’. “My master made me this collar so I can talk—Squirrel! My master…”]

“Hai, sensei?”
[Unnecessary Japanese]

“If you think-”
“I do. And I don’t think you ever have.
[*Snap*, definitely not something an unmodified Ranma would say, but this unleashed Ranma might]

including being tossed to a covered pit of cats
[I’m surprised you don’t tell us he even cringes. ‘Unleashed’ though he may be, that’s some POWERFUL programming]

poisoned by some of the ‘fiancées’
[Actually, only Kodachi’s done that. Still, he’s ranting and wouldn’t necessarily be speaking the objective truth]

at the age of five.
[Younger, actually. Ranma was a little toddler who couldn’t even walk at the time that he signed the Seppuku contract, and various flashbacks with Genma taking him around imply that Ranma was 2-3]

I can become invisible at will,
[Not quite, the Umisenken works by slipping into the opponent’s blind spot, but he’s probably exaggerating]

I can manipulate the pressure points on your body to make you so sensitive to heat that even mildly warm water
[The fact that Cologne used the ‘cat tongue’ point on him doesn’t mean that he can use it]

or take away your strength
[And he never really seemed to exploit the possible shiatsu attacks. Sharp blows to the back of the head, yes, shiatsu ‘instant unconscious’ attacks ala Aondehafka’s “White Rose” no, not in canon anyway]

“Up to you two,”
[I’m shocked that he isn’t saying ‘I ain’t gonna get married, all of you are out’. Kasumi’s treated him kindly but also shown him little attention. Nabiki used him and Akane hasn’t respected him. All of his maybe-fiancées have serious flaws, and with the mood he’s in (he’s at the ‘leave me alone’ point rather than ‘I need a friend’) I’d think he should be demanding he be left his space and the point is left hanging]

practice alot.
[a lot?]

So it’s been a busy two weeks,
[I’m pretty certain it was longer than two weeks, particularly from Jusenkyo. Even without Shampoo hunting her/him, that’s a lot of hiking until you can get to the nearest bus or rail, and then from there by plane either to Japan or to the docks for boat; those _might_ get them there in two weeks. Given that it’s Ranma and then factoring in Shampoo, then Genma being a stingy moron, I’d say more like a month minimum, probably 2-3. Still, you do note below that Nabiki’s making logical assumptions (even if incorrect) off what she knows, which is pretty good. I’m mostly curious as to where the ‘two weeks’ came from when Ranma never says it]

“Itetetetete…”
[Unnecessary Japanese – besides the fact that I’m going to guess a large portion of your ENGLISH audience doesn’t know that ‘ite’ is Japanese for ‘ow’]

I… I want to get out! I want to have friends again! I want to be a nurse! I don’t want to be old and unmarried!
[The build with Kasumi was extremely well done, she’s given so little focus in canon that she might either enjoy being a near-automaton (or she’s an evil genius toying with Nerima) or she’s this desperate woman without hope or options, and you portrayed your stance particularly well]

“Please, regard me kindly!”
[Thank you for not using the Japanese or an awkward translation]

… right into the chair Ranma had tripped over
[This whole comical sequence was definitely the sort of comedy in Ranma ½]

Ranma could actually hear smirking.
[Yep, that’s Nabiki]

more that she told me.
[than]

That **, Cologne,
[I’m confused, why is Ranma angry at Cologne teaching it to him? The entire point was to defeat Happosai, and of course she wouldn’t have told him everything there was to learn in it – it took Ranma a week to learn it even after repeated simplified explanations and demonstrations. She helped him out with little to gain (note she didn’t demand he marry Shampoo, she just offered the Soul of Ice and Hiryuu Shoten Ha)]

against, Saffron.
[Why’s there a comma?]

the Phoenix Pill can make you immune to extreme heat,
[There’s also the possibility that it may permanently affect the person, down to the blood, which could mean that they didn’t have many because they may have simply bred the resistance characteristic throughout the tribe. Just an outside possibility]

It just goes to show, the Amazons care nothing about what happens to outsiders,
[Or they don’t want to hand their hated enemies nukes…sometimes you keep weapons from spreading because you don’t want them used against anyone (particularly you), not because you want to remain the 800-lbs gorilla. I think Ranma would realize this]

I got a thousand yen that says she shoved another Phoenix Pill down Shampoo’s throat before we left
[What, would you assume she’d let her granddaughter burn to death? That’s overly callous. I also wouldn’t discount her thinking Ranma would get the Gekkaja, although the possibility _is_ small]

gouge tear bend break bleed mutilate
[Given the scene, I don’t see this as funny. I see this as an unrestrained Ranma literally and brutally tearing Kuno apart. Before he used the hellfire he’d have already rent Kuno to the point of death and at least partial delimbing, and that goes beyond the needs of the scene. I may not like Tatewaki (though he’s pretty good in ‘Umbrella of Lies’), but this implication of a true murder attempt with Ranma not dealing with any such consequences doesn’t sit well with me]

Because I’ve got a big thing of magic inside of me.
[The Jusenkyo curse?]

What to do about the Doctor, though,
[I don’t get why Ranma’s thinking like this in the first place, Tofu’s never been a threat and in this world he and Ranma wouldn’t even know each other]

This time around, he’d never made that stupid promise.
[Ryouga also hasn’t done something with it to draw anybody’s ire]

I like it. It's an interesting take on everyone's situation, and rather realistic in my view.
Great work. Looking forward to more :-)

love the story to bad its dead

Of course we insist that you update this fic, by the way... your late on that!