I really enjoyed that. Fantastic writing, made me read every word.

Although, I could have done without the cliffy.

Hello again - KnifeEdge, just finished your excellent Immortal Love. Hands down - the BEST Labyrinth piece I have ever read. The word that kept coming to mind while reading - "real". Dealing with fantasy and magic - it's sometimes difficult to reach a realistic element that resonates with readers. You completely captured this in the emotional playout with Jared and Sarah - those tension/heartache feelings truly came across as relatable and genuine. I loved your moody Jareth - the passionate king who totally belongs to Sarah. Loved the lemon at the end - wish there had been more.

As I mentioned before, your writing is tight and efficient - straight to the point without being overly dramatic and broken. Your Sarah was smack on the mark - you could see the younger Sarah completely in her. It was addicting to read her and glimpse those small insights into Jareth.

Now...I have to know are you intending - ever - to finish the sequel?? I have somewhat of a personal rule never to read a fan fiction piece until it's complete. I get too involved in the story and it kills me when the author decides to abandon it. I noticed you haven't updated in a year - yet the last chapter in the sequel you talk about having 3 chapters already done. Any status update you can give here?? Would love to hear news.

But finishing up with Immortal - just loved it! I'm a mom - busy and have a hectic life - so I want to sit down and read things that are quality writing, deep characterization and have an excellent plot. Yours was in the top! Good luck in your current writing.

Okay seriously, this is brilliant! Totally amazing writing. I read your bio (or whatever you called your advice) - found it insightful and moving. But then I actually started reading Immortal and was blown away. The patience and yet timing of the plot and characters. I'm not even 1/2 way through and I keep silently saying, "wow". Your dialogue just hits the spot - it could not be delivered in a better way.

I agree - most writers don't get the older Sarah. She's hard. But it seems like you have really moved into her world.

I'm loving this - cant wait to read the rest. I hope you have not given up hope on your sequel - have not clicked over to it yet - just happened to see it on your list.

Good luck with your writing. I'll come back when I'm done and give you a better review.

I cant put into words how much i love what you have done in this story.. I've LOVED the labyrinth since i was small, my first crush was our oh so HOT goblin king. this was so vivid and colorful. i could feel myself re-living the movie and the magic and excitement of it all over again, but with the grown up twists of lust and passion and love. thank you thank you. have you writen and novels? if so i'd LOVE to read them

This story ended very abruptly so I am of course promptly off to find the sequels (I hope they're not still on hiatus!). However, I just wanted to say that while I've indeed read this story a thousand times before in variations, your writing is very pleasant to read. It flows neatly and you get some very emotional stuff dealt with without going all sappy and angsty. I approves.

GRAWR!

well I suppose I'm off to the sequel.

I apologize for the lack of reviews, I was being a bit selfish, I HAD to finish the story and had no time to stop! lol So really, it's your fault for writing a brilliantly fascinating story! HA! sorry.

I can't wait to get started :D

LMFAO! popcorn!

I had to refrain from bursting out laughing at 12 am

I love it

Haha, loved it! It was such a good sweet story...now I'm going to go check to see if the sequel is there...

(By the way, I loved your, "Reasons not to kill the author" list... More people need to write those... :P)

...By the way, I should like to apologize for the thousand and one type-os with which I have riddled your comment box. That and, in my last comment, I had meant to write "godliest." Not "godless." Ehem.

I look forward with the greatest of anticipation for your Dangers story.

Alright: my final rant.

Know that I have every intention of saving this story and reading it whenever I watch Labyrinth. It is the most perfect, in character, well flowing Labyrinth fan-fiction I have ever read.

Oh my bloody goodness! You're making a sequel!? TWO?! I do believe I shall faint. Ooh! Ooh! Question. Might you stick in the two quotes of the Wiseman? I'm sorry. I'm hooked on them... almost as much as I am on your godless of godless stories.

Your way of writing Sarah was extraordinary: shy, brave, innocent (not at all pushy) and never ONCE falling into Mary-Suedum.

And the same holds true for Jareth, and how you made him so very, very vulnerable... and yet still Jareth.

The new goblins you included were wonderful, as was Shove's revenge.

I can't wait for the next confrontation with the Fae in your next story, and look forward to it with great, great enthusiasm!... though you could probably tell that already.

Right, enough ranting on my part. Once again, your story is godly, and I look forward to more.

Best,
Waif.

The way you made her say his lines was brilliant, and made me wish, just a little, when he'd said them that he would have had some idea of when and how they might have been thrown back at him. Brilliant.

The ball was extraordinary, and the easy and loveliness with which you intertwined fae and humans in the ball was beautiful, as was the way you garbed Sarah. I can't wait to read about this dark magic and what it may entail!

That, and Jareth's much looked forward to jealousy.

Your re-writing of the scene of Stairs was excellent and stirring and everything I or anyone could ever have wanted. I rally do think I'm just going to have to read your fan-fiction after every time I watch the movie.

...wow.

Alright, when I began reading this about how Sarah's mother was descended from an ancient line of Mortal Royalty I thought 'Oh dear. Here comes the stretched fan-fictiony plot.'

And then you threw in the line "My kingdom as great." That threw me for such a whirl. The way you incorporated the actual text of the movie with your own plot was brilliant, and solidified your point fantastically.

That, and your reference to when Hoggle said that Sarah would never find her way out of the heart of the Labyrinth. That too, was a stroke of utter brilliants! I don't know how you make it all tie in together just so beautiful, but I must say that no sequel has ever made such fantastic and beautiful scene.

It was also wonderful to see the worlds of the Wiseman mentioned in your plot. Somehow he' seem to always be the ultimate sequel-catchphrases.

But goodness, what an absolutely staggering, brilliant web of movie and fan-fiction.

This chapter was sad, and conflicted and extraordinary. And the situation you made for Sarah (a Sarah that so very much seem the grown up movie Sarah) where she is without Jareth, is heart-cleaving.