Hey, I think this story is pretty alright, just that you need to take note of your tenses, which seem to pull the really hot parts down. Also, I think the ending could've been done better. This is a constructive review, and it isn't a flame so I hope you don't take this in the wrong way. Overall, not bad for your first fic.

wassup hu said evil ws a bd thng...well, heres ma review...i think your story is pretty cool but please try not to make mistakes at the really HOT parts...not to be mean...but as a joke...it was really wierd when you said sweat instead of sweet. Overall...ROCK ON!

dude ace.plz extend this im likin this pairing odd enough.

I thought it was really good, especially if it's your first story!!

One suggestion (and it's NOT a flame!)I would have is to watch your tenses because you switch from past to present and it makes the story a little confusing.

Otherwise, it's a good read and I hope you'll write more!

it was a nice fic... you wrote the kissing scene as if you alresdy did it... wahahahaha! kidding! love you bea p.! hope you'll write a blaise - luna fic. cant wait!;)

Hm, I liked it.

That was really good! can't wait to see if you add to it! Chat with you later! Good luck :)