Reviews for The Other Side

Reviews For: The Other Side

The Lightning Flash 2006-03-07 ch 6,	abuseOh! Finished posting? Lovely story, as you already know. :P Great job, and I've reviewed like I said I would . . .
Blue-Inked Frost 2006-02-16 ch 6,	abuseNice story! I'm so sorry I can't comment more--I'm on a plane at present. I liked this chapter, and the take on the Ace/Random friendship. And the previous one, needless to say. Some good plot ideas flowing there, and a fairly 'canonical' conclusion that I can really imagine being part of an episode if there was one. It needs another conclusion chapter, though. :P
Scarabbug 2006-02-15 ch 6,	abuseI think a squee wouldn’t be too inappropriate ^^ You got there in the end. You’ve taken a good idea and turned it into something pretty damn realistic. Loved the little weird hallucination thing too – oh, and the hug (if I was Simon I still would’ve grounded him, though :P) Sorry I can’t nitpick more. I know I should but it’s late and I’m incoherent :P You know I loved it.
Scarabbug 2006-02-06 ch 4,	abuseGah… H, what can I say that hasn’t already been said? You know I love it ^_^ and I can’t wait to see something new. Nitpicks: “Watch the paintwork! This is my mum’s car!” – Chuck would use the term “mom” – American style rather than “mum” which is what Mark would say. I expect you muddled them up. ‘“Too qu…” Chuck started, then shut his mouth as Mark gave him a funny look.’ – Oh, god that’s cute! That’s funny! I’m gonna icon that if I can find a picture of mark giving Chuck one of “those” looks ^_^. You have some good moments in this fic than make it feel really genuine. Could you perhaps, try and put a bit more action into your fight scenes. They’re q bit jerky in some places and slow in others. Work on them. Sparx made a disgusted face. “Right, now we know he’s gone crazy…” – amen to H’s very IC Sparx ^_^ Googler laughed. “Zip and Snip are way too quick!” – nice Googler quip. It’s so hard to think of something original to say with that guy… “Maybe you’re the only one who can’t control it,” growled Ace, alerting Random to his presence. So Random’s evil side had been what had pushed him to finally put his power to a worthy use. – you change POV to Ace here, make that change more clear. Your Ace and Random argument is rather chilling… so many raw wounds are jabbed and you set it up really well and in tune with canon. Congrats. Your Ace – LI argument? Very well done. Very canon apt. What can I say? Go on, please, do go on.
Blue-Inked Frost 2006-02-06 ch 4,	abuseI'm liking it, but the short paragraphs feel a bit jerky and repetitive. Kilobyte was good, though I think this chapter felt a little less lively than the previous ones. Ace's introspection was also well done, I thought. It's an interesting dilemma, too--should Random be the one to have to keep the evil? Lady Illusion's attitude change towards evil!Ace felt a little sudden to me; it's how I said I thought she'd eventually react, but it felt a little too fast and didn't have much insight into what was going through her head. Anyway, nice one. :)
Blue-Inked Frost 2006-01-30 ch 3,	abuseI have to admit, the last bit really worked for me. (is shipper) Though there'll also be development in that direction, I suspect--LI probably liked him in the first place because of gentle/kind 'good' qualities, and I can almost see her telling off the newer more bullying version. You wrote her IC in this chapter, which is great for someone who doesn't like her. I'm feeling sorry about Lord Fear--he's not even the SECOND best villain any more. But he is incompetent, so it's IC for that view of him. Random's program is having a slightly different effect on Ace, which is interesting and seems to fit with what Ace was, but it seems more merged with Ace's personality than Random's two seperate halves. A good plot setup--will Random take it back, or will they get rid of it for good? :) Also, Ace's character development going through this, and him feeling the need to warn the former friends, was well done.
Scarabbug 2006-01-24 ch 2,	abuse“I take it then that this is not some insane plan to infiltrate the evils?” Nope, nope it's not, Randy :P What can I say? seen it already and you know I love it. Am getting excited to find out how it ends now, hope to see more of it soon. Would be more conerent and lengthy in my review but... tis late... gah. Basically it's well done, and you cut off in just the right place too.
Blue-Inked Frost 2006-01-24 ch 2,	abuseYes, it does indeed sound like something weird has happened to Ace. It seems very externally forced rather than a transformation from the inside that he's turned to Kilobyte, the overload and Kilobyte contributing to something like Random's imposed change rather than character development. Which disappoints me a bit, as I was hoping for meaty character change, but it is still an interesting plot with other oportunities for character development. In the fight scene, it seemed almost as though you were trying to write for a film, with different characters shown in different shots rather quickly. This is what happens in the canon medium, but in the written medium it might have been better to have focused on one character's point of view; the frequent changing of focuses made it feel a little disjointed, bland, and lacking in spirit thanks to a neutral perspective. By the way, since Rick is still around I assume you've set this to go AU somewhere in the middle of third season? Which is fair enough, but not quite what I was expecting. “My mistake for picking a girl for a sidekick…” Sexist!Ace really shocks me. He's shown nothing of the sort in canon; Sparx is reactive against a feminine ideal, but the world of the Lightning Knights would be subtly rather than overtly sexist considering that Sparx still is a professional--not to mention, of course, that Ace is aware that LI is extremely dangerous. The last scene was very chilling; Ace's change came across as very threatening. I can't complain about any of your characterisations overall, and this was well written. Wonderful job. :)
Blue-Inked Frost 2006-01-19 ch 1,	abuseTesting...
Scarabbug 2006-01-18 ch 1,	abuseIt's posted! Squee! You already know my opinions on this, H :) and nothing really leaps out at me when it comes to spelling and grammar here, so as of yet, it's looking good. What I really wanna see is the bits I haven't read yet ^_^ What can I say? keep it up! :)

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