I like the idea of your story, but it's hard for me to read it through without proper character analysis and grammar use.

Quite enthralling. I am off to check the sequel *crosses fingers and hopes its actually finished unlike so many others * I am most interested i learning what Narcissa is slipping to her to make her ill as well as whyand who is the man in the black cloak?

Quite enthralling. I am off to check the sequel *crosses fingers and hopes its actually finished unlike so many others * I am most interested i learning what Narcissa is slipping to her to make her ill as well as whyand who is the man in the black cloak?

I loved readin this story x cant wait to read the sequel xxxxxx

I really liked this story. But, you really need to know the differences between 'Your'-'You're','Here'-'Hear','Were'-'Where'-'Wear' & etc.

i think marie is awesome XD good chapter!

wow that was sad... but it was a good chapter anyway

I have a feeling that I am digging far too deep in this, but my guess is that the girl is hermione. Her first initial is H and the L. Ion means lion, insinuating she is a Gryffindor, but I am probably wrong

You have quite a good story here, but I would suggest that you take on the services of a beta. There are quite a few mistakes that are simply edited. Examples include: effect vs. affect; too vs. too; etc.

Off I go again.

And I think I liked it. )

no! narcissa cant actually be a bitch! agh.

wow i really liked this story and cant wait to move on and read the sequel... because there are a lot of loose ends that im happy there is a sequel to read! congrats on a well written story tho, i really liked every bit of it!

anthony? so not inspired, sorry :

Great story - really well written and captivating :)

hm well that was definitely an interesting chapter i wonder whats going to happen now

interesting character this marie is