I really liked this chapter, especially the way you formatted it, with Naruku and Kenshin taking turns telling the story. It flows together, and it's nice to see how the two groups are getting along. I'll be waiting until they meet each other again!

Hey there, I thought I was beta-ing this? xDD

Anyway, I liked Misao and Naruku's interaction in this, and I'm glad you explained what she was talking about with Aoshi in her last letter. The scene was very poignant, and I loved your use of words to describe the part where Naruku starts crying, and the letters scatter over the floor. "And Misao quietly held Naruku as she cried, the words of her past scattered on the floor in front of her." Very touching.

You had a couple of typos in here. I can't point out exactly where, but it doesn't detract from this chapter at all. Good luck with finishing the next chapter! I'm looking forward to it.

Yay, update. Sorry for taking so long to review. Anyway, the letter in the beginning surprised me, but I'll wait for the explanation patiently (as long as it isn't six more months!). I like Misao and Naruku's interaction; they make really good friends. And Naruku's coming back to the Aoiya was a pleasant scene; well written, because I was worried along with Naruku that nobody would recognize her. It would be completely horrible if the people you loved didn't remember you anymore.

By the way, I think I found you over on Fictionpress. You're writing Disney Gave Me Unrealistic Expectations About Love, right? (I'm fragmented blue). I think I'll pop over there and review your newest chapters, now. =D

liem

oh hoh hoh! see? i'm not the only one that takes 6 months to update! :3

and yes, that letter was pretty funky. i'm guessing it was a forgery or something like that, because naruku/aoshi just doesn't seem right. in fact, i think it's kinda icky XD. then again, you be the author and have the power to make this fic go whichever way ye please!

omg i'm so tired... i need to sleep...

so sorry if this review is scatterbrained and silly, because that's how i am right now @_@. but i still really loved it. nothing like a heartfelt reunion to make you go "aw" and all that. i'm expecting much more drama between naruku and misao, though...

ah well, i guess i'll just have to wait! keep it up! ^^

There's nothing wrong with your brain. I leave a lot of words out when I handwrite too. Anyway, this chapter was good. You showed Yahiko's desperation well: how he was willing to go back to stealing if it meant saving the dojo. He and Kaoru's brother-sister relationship was really sweet (even when she's pulling his ear xD). Although Yahiko's fear about Kaoru renting herself out is just paranoia, I think. Kaoru's too honorable for that!

Liem

Shiess! Did I miss the next chapter of the Naruku story?! Oh, I'm sorry I didn't get around to reading it. I was sitting there waiting on Forever Wandering. ^^

Anyways, I wouldn't be reviewing in such a giddy mood if I didn't like it. Um, there was nothing I could even point out, though. I do see some conflict within the group, though. Maybe a strong sense of yearning for somebody, perhaps. Guess I'll find out when I get back to America. ^^, take care!

Hey, sorry its taken quite so long.. been very hectic, this week.

Neway, amusing chapter this. Lots happening.. and a good few unexpected turns. The writing itself is brisk and well lighter and quicker.. a definate plus for the content.

I didn't notice much in terms of mistakes and i enjoyed the chapter very much.

Will be looking forward to the next! :)
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Lovely! I'm still marveling at how much your writing has improved. I was just thinking about how this fic was when I first read it, compared to now. Wow, not bad, if I do say so myself ^_^

So I think this has been one of my more favorite chapters. It just seems more composed and well put together. The whole thing flowed so easily and I had no trouble really losing myself in the atmosphere of the dojo. It's sad, isn't it? And it really isn't fair for them. *sigh* Ah, they'll figure someting out...

I did notice one typo! It actually happens a *lot* to tons of other people who's fics I read, and it really irks me a lot of the time. You spelled "lose" (to have a lack of) as "loose" (to be unbound).

But besides that... yep, all good! I'm definitely looking forward to the next one XD

First, with some of the critique: "Naruku was floored, unable to anything but gape..." You're missing "do" in that sentence. And "If only he has become a little less reckless, wizened to the truths of the world." doesn't seem to really...fit in there. It seems kind of jerky [I don't know if you really understand me...]. "One the nearly took her head off." It should be "that." "...Hiko's dark obsidian beads" sounds kind of...weird. It makes him sound kind of squinty-eyed and creepy. xD And his giving Naruku his sword was kind of sudden. Not something I think he would do, but oh well, it's your story.

Now, for the good things. I really enjoyed the Hiko/Naruku interaction as well. Ahh, Hiko is so good at irritating people. It was funny to see how irritated he got Naruku. And since he's Naruku's master's master, that makes it even more interesting! I can't wait to see what happens next chapter. Naruku will be meeting her "Kyoto friends," right?

Liem

Ha ha, Hiko's so infuriating! It seems right that he would get under Naruku's skin. I loved reading this chapter, their interactions were very well done. You kept both of them true to their characters, and it was also *really* amusing. So then, is she heading to the Oniwabanshu then? In any case, I'm looking forward to your next chapter, so hurry up and come back from Japan! (*mutter lucky mumble groan*) ^_^

Oh, good chapter! I very much enjoyed reading this, I'd wondered what Hiko's reaction would be once he learned Kenshin had a pupil, even if it's not the same Hiten Mitsurugi he learned. I love Naruku's internal dialogue here, and her conversation with Hiko. Looks like she's going to have something to ponder on, for the rest of her journey...can't wait for the next chapter, as always!

Hey..

The effort here is evident.. good on u for that.

But to be bitingly honest(eh hehe) i didn't much like the way u pulled this chapter through.

At first i had ur "hermit" pegged as one of the many extraordinary OCs that u bring around. It wasn't till u told us that it was Hiko that i transplanted the image of a well, old "giant-man".. perhaps a little work on the word choice there. Following that, the entire dialogue and well action erm.. a little off. For one thing the frankness, for another, the fighting the new pupil of Hiten Mitsurugi and finally the way the dialogue itself rolled through..just my opinion u understand, a little too heavy on coincidences and the emotional element.. his is a VERY difficult character to get the voice right with(my time is coming soon enough.. -_-;) But don't listen to me, ^__^ i'm just the babling idiot here.. :p

Thinking along the lines of the plot, this was a strong and well done chapter.. new twists too, a jar of "Megumi cream".. hehe..

I can not wait for this to continue(gues i have to :p).. Naruku on the streets of Kyoto with two tachi and a faithful(not) Makkou.. Onwards.

..

Wait, so you're going to Japan? Damn you, woman! I'd give a kidney to go to Japan!!

It'll be awesome, you'll have such a good time! XD

Naturally, it's Naruku centric. I mean, why wouldn't it be? Y'know, she kinda reminds me of Kenshin now, especially with how she talks, although her reasons for being lofty are slightly different. I'm so glad they're out of that stupid place, it's about time! Well written chapter, I really enjoyed it. And who was she writing to in the beginning?? O_o

^^ have fun in japan!

Go Naruku! Good on her for being determined to help those girls, even though it could have all gone horribly wrong! And good on her for giving them the comb. It's symbolic in a way too, showing that she's on the path to getting over Enizu...

I simply love the contrast of the letter, to the present. She really did seem naive..but still, as I read it, I couldn't help but feel sorry for her. Heaps of women make that mistake, all the time!

I wonder what is happening at the Kamiya dojo..I can't wait to see! But I also hope there'll be some Naruku too, I wonder where she will go next before she comes to the realisation that there is only one place she really belongs to..oh, and have a great time in Japan! :D

I love how you describe Naruku's confusion about the new development in her relationship with Enizu. "...little enough to question the sky's blueness or wonder at the meaning behind a songbird's tweet." That one line sums it up so well.

Naruku's memories and how she longed for attention was really sad; it moved me. I can even kind of connect with her, and as an author, that is a great accomplishment for you: when your reader feels like they know the character. I'm jealous of you. >.<

Geez, those people must have been really sloshed if they didn't notice Naruku coming through with a sword. And you're going to Japan? Lucky, lucky you.

Liem