Dear Alucard,

If you ever need a midnight snack, feel free to swing by my way. You can bite me any day of the week and I'll gladly let you be my master. Also is Integra gay, she really does confuse me with her style in wardrobe. Admit it you sexy beast, you wouldn't mind deflowering your master or your fledging. XD

Ps: You're too hot for your own good.

Dragonlance

Dear Alucard,

Sory bout my other mail, but can you help me fix my .50 caliber sniper rifle? I sort of lost the instructions when I dismanteled it(maybe Seras know something about it after all it is a S.W.A.T. weapon and her harkonnen is also a rifle).

Also how do repair your costumes in less than a minute that get torn, burn or slashed by your enemies( like Anderson)?.

-Kharne-

P.S. I got an idea on how to torture somebody on your show. It was great! You really like your doggy form huh?

Dear Alucard-san,

1.Do you know how to use any other kinds of weapons?

2.I need help with getting rid of the bullies at my school, can you please help me?

3.Have you ever had to go to a courthouse?

4.Have you ever played shooting games at the arcade? If so, please come to Florida and play a game of Time Crisis 3 with me!

5.Do you know the email/phone number/or location of that cute catboy from Millenium?

Yours truly,

Johnny Ohm, The Electric Warrior

P.S.:If you see that Iscariot SOB Maxwell, please kill him, then send me his head on a silver platter! Also, say hello to Seras for me! I think she knows me from way back when.

Dear Alu-dono,

Hi! Can I touch your hat?

And I was wondering, since it seems that your hat and glasses are the only part of your outfit that does not regenerate with you (I could be wrong about this, do you have a big armoir full of spare hats and glasses in your room? I think you should.

And if it makes you feel any better, yaoi scares me too.

-Lethal Virtue

PS. I am also a fangirl, although a less rabid one. Please do not kill me.

Konnichiwa Allers!

Omg...can you believe this? You should kill my cousin cause she said you were ugly!She said," Okay, I put up with you liking Yazoo,Cloud,Sephiroth,Dante,Vergil, but this...this is an injustice!" Can you believe that? Omg! And y'know...I feel bad that they pair you up with Anderson in some stories...that...that's the real injustice right there! lol! Oh! Me,Wesker,the Valentine Bro's( Haha!), Vergil, and...I forgot what other bad guy there was...um...oh well! Yeah! Anyways! Wesker is going to take over a show in Raccoon City and I think you should send us a videotape about your problems! He's a real good psychiatrist! If ya know what I mean! Oh...now I remember! Just watch out for our Alu-Clone...he might think you are trying to copy him and might shoot you with his "Imitation Jack-All" Beware! How we made a clone of you...'tis a secret...

-Dark and tainted thoughts!

RedWingedAngelChaos

P.S.

Just cause the tips of my angel wings are stained crimson red does NOT mean that I dipped them in blood XD

This. Is. AWESOME!

Dear Alucard,

GAR! I'M GOING TO POKE YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT! *poke poke poke* HA! WHAT'RE YOU GONNA DO NOW! HUH? ...punk... D: I don't like that kind of attitude young man! GO TO YOUR ROOM!

As you can possibly see, I'm insane D:

-Kitty

Aww, no! Don't stop it there! This is SO hilarious...XD XD

The email address for Alucard isn't showing up though. T_T Is it possible if you could PM it to me?

Anyway, please don't end it with the next chapter...T_T

Michelle

Dear Alucard,

I live in a large city, which has quite a vampire problem. Now, this adorable kitten I've recently picked up off the alley has been eyeing and stalking me in a certain way- I have come to suspect it is actually a vampire... should I kill the cat? If so, what method carries the smallest possibility of dying?

Also, I've read an article of you (while you were -ahem- alive) saying that you would often impale your victims up the ass. I would like some clarification as to whether or not this was actually true.

Thank you for your time.

Sincerely,

Salacious Saladin

PS: Try guessing my age.

Hey Alucard-sama?

Just wanted to ask, how young are you? What would ya do to Edward Elric in a fight? And, could you possibly, pretty, pretty please kill my younger brother, he's annoying me to no end.

Storm

PS: If me and my boyfriend get married and have kids, and it's a boy we are naming him Al-for Alucard.

Dear Alucard,

yes i am a girl. most ppl think i'm a boy because of my name but i'm not. i'm sure i'll be recruted. f not i'll forse integra in to leting me join. i have plenty ideas. i could send my pack of ghost wolfs to taunt her or summon a demon to attack or i could do something else. either way i'm getting in the org. what do ya think? i'll be seeing you around HQ real soon.

ps: if ya wana know what i am, i'm a wolf demon w/ silver hair and yellow eyes that turn a glowing silvery blue in the dark.

pss: i carry both guns and swors (along w/ other blades and weapons)

love ya kill ya

blade assassin

Dear Alucard,

In your opinion who would win in a fight? Robots or vampires? I personally think robots... but that's just me.

...Oh. And my friend wants to know if you've ever googled the phrases 'tubgirl' and 'oh god'. She says you should. Excuse me now, but I must was out my bleeding eyes with lava. n.n;

-Stabbity Death and Co.

Dear Big Red,

It's me again! I'm on a sugar high! I hope I have a good evil laugh! Mahahahahahahaha! Ok, now to get to the asking questions part. Have you ever seen a werewolf? If you did, what happened with that? I heard that Captain is secretly a werewolf.. Who would win a werewolf or a vamp? Hope to here all your wise answers soon! With love,

Rhi

Ps. I called the number... and some guy that goes by Major picked up. And I think I heard Walter's voice in the background..What's up with that?

Pss. You have a sexy a$$! _

Mwah, Awesome Chapter

Dear Alucard

Umm, have you seen Anderson lately? ehehe, I think he has finaly lost it, and disapeared... Well any way do you know what happened to that Major guy? Yeah since anderson went missing I need a new person to stalk well Later.

DaughterofVlad

Dear Alucard-

I have some interesting things to tell you.

1. Guess which dark corner of your bedroom I'm hiding in!

2. I discovered a being that is threatening to copy your kickass super powers, and otherworldly, slithering, and perfectly silky hair. His name is Naraku, King of Yaoi, and he wants you to become "one with his body." AH!

3. Let me know if my leather and chain gift found its way to you!

I love you oh sexiest of the sexy beasts! Now kindly go slaughter the Japanese, half-demon, yaoi extrodanaire that is copying you're powers and is trying to make you "one with his body." DIE Naraku! DIE! DIE! DIE! Ahem

Lots of Stalker Love,

Denekrad