This is quite possibly one of the best stories in this fandom. It has emotional depth and the fact that you don't shy away from killing your primary characters leaves me curious as to what could happen. Your style is fluid, concise, clear and most of all energetic. The characters are all interesting and well rounded but not static. They are constantly changing. I look forward to reading more.

Your right, it is getting muddier. In fact, it's getting as clear as mud. =)

Both 'outside' human groups are doing recon first by the looks of it. Who wouldn't really. Still, their sight is in a form of tunnel vision, as no one bothers to catch a random glimpse of the SHIMMER... Just once madam Mikaa, I'd like to see someone see that shimmer... and then maybe die after seeing it. o_0 (Any 'real people as characters to die' spots still open? =P)

The catfi- .. er, arguement between Marisa and Kylie was good, nice to see the nutcase's confusion.

Even with this chapter, I can envision more mud coming my way in the next one, or later. =) Cya.

- DasNewfie

"One of those big laser cannon things!" Rofl on that one =D.

So, Ms. McCullough is still looking for her revenge it seems. She doesn't even realize that revenge is like love; it blinds her to all else thats going on. As to who the latest unknown party is, I have to guesses for as to who it may be, but I'm not going to risk being laughed at just yet. =) Nope, that'll be for later.

An interesting chapter this one is. What should be even more interesting is the next installment. =). Later.

- DasNewfie

So I was on the right track, Foxy did do it intentionally. But she didn't expect the backlash from her 'experiment,' did she? =)

And what does Marisa do when she needs to clear her head? She goes shopping. Must be a girl thing. =P Anyway, I am glad to see that Marisa decided to move on and 'want' to become a hunter, still after everything she has went through.

It was fun to read. Now I'm going to read Chp six.

- DasNewfie

Smooth and sleek story, you've got the mind of a story teller. I just have to say that the titles are interesting as well. I can't tell what language their in but I'm going be stupid and guess that its Latin.

Thanks for the read. Keep up the good work (and also read my boring first fan fic also please)

Heh.
The watchers are being watched.
Nice suspense. ^_^

Sadistic means are often the best teachers.

^_^

Hi. It's been a while since I've was at fanfic dot net, so imagine my surprise when I started getting bot alerts in my inbox saying the Outsider was being updated again =D.

This is a review for the first three chapters. The transition for Marisa the human, to a greving, vengeful wanna-be hunter is very interesting to read. Not only that, but the flow of the story is going well, not rushed, not dragged out. I love it.

Now a review for Chp 4. IMHO, it seems that 'Foxy' intented to brute force her way through the building anyway. The previous plan on having Marisa find her way to the observation point was just a ruse. It was only something to let Marisa be in theory 'at ease,' given her situation. As I type this, I'm beginning to think that even more. If not vomiting while cleaning a trophy was a test, then watching what 'Foxy's' student will hopefully do is definitely a test too.

Now us readers, get to see if Marisa can become the predator, and to kill her prey. I see a great mental battle coming for your character Mikaa. Great job on this so far... =)

- DasNewfie.

*grins*

All will become clear soon.

Maybe.

Kind of.

Ish.

"Soon" being relative when I'm writing a chapter a day :)

Me thinks someone is being forced to act.
I'd like to know what set Foxy off though...

Nice.
I like the comment about how Marisa came up with the name. ^_^

Awsome. She's gonna kick some ass! ...Eventually.


I hope that experiment isn't what I think it is. It probably is, but I can hope.

Good chapter.
*Sits, staring at the screen, eagerly awaiting more*

i read your first outsider story and it was excellent i have read the chapters over and over again.

The chapters in this one are great but i think you should do a altenat one (as well) say if Cally won and found Marisa (how had been trained by the elder while she was recovering) in the Elders ship after killing him and the other clan came and took both as young bloods.

What would happen then? Example they could fight aliens, bad bloods, the colonial marines, the bugs (out of starship troopers), or even meet and fight alone side the charaters out of veriea fornnan's story (if she or he let's you) or againist them, or any other creatures that you can think of if you want.

Or as another example they stay on earth and fight the drug lords again with the help of another clan, take on that reporter, the police, swat, the army.

Liked the new chapter.

I've read the first one and I can honestly say this is really going to be interesting please update soon