Brill story, but how about delving into the story a little? it sounds good so far, so why not carry it on a little?

it needs to be edited but the story is good I can't wait to read another chapter. plz update soon.

A very interesting start so far! You should check the grammar because there were a few sentences that didn't quite make sense, but other than that, I liked it! Keep up the great work!

hey i like the story so far can't wait to see what happens next

WOW!

I think it's good so far. Keep going.

Is it just the one part or is there more? If there is more then please update soon. _

love it but you may want to recheck before you post it becaus i ahd to read it three times for it to make sence i think some of the words are a bit jummbled

interesting chapter! send in the next one soon!