...wow

Hello,
How are you?I hope either way your day is getting better.I find that this fanfiction is interesting in the way of analyzing the character Artemis viewwing it in three different ways.
signed
Sali

That was really, really beautiful.

wow... confusing, but good. But since this is a dream i understand the confusing part. THe clarity between dreams was kind of weird. I didn't get the first part wtih Angeline. Mind an explanation? Yeah... so good, so intriguing. Is arty going insane? (sorry, didn't read blood sonata.)

I could swear that I've read and reviewed this before ... But I don't think I have? It's really, really great! Really made me ponder things...

That was unbelivably nice. You might think I crazy but it is the fact the -mondern- Artemis can feel emotions...Holly killing him...was a bit scary but it makes hte story powerful. Nice Job!

/:/Brizo/:/

This is really good. I mean, awesome. Beautifully written, and if you get the chance, I would change the characters' names and submit it to a writing magazine. who knows, you could win!

*opens up review box and types as she reads*

Interesting beginning. The simple sentence structures give it a vaguely dreamlike quality, very consistent with the subject matter. I like.

"its deepness not unlike a glow cube he had seen somewhere" - um, what? Maybe I'm ignorant for not even knowing what a glow cube *is*, but this similie didn't do much for me. *shrug* Even after I googled to find out what it was, it didn't seem like something Artemis would just casually refer to.

Oh, wow. I like the way you bring in that it's a dream. That really *feels* like the way I realise I'm in a dream.

"Artemis was suitably confused by this collection of sentences, for he could not make no sense of it." The "for" seemed weird to me. I'd replace the ", for" with a semicolon if I were you.

In the line beginning "“Oh yes,” the boy replied pleasantly," Artemis uses the word "very" three times, which seemed wrong.

Wow. Again and again, I'm going to keep saying this feel so much like a *dream*!

"Artemis lent lose" I think you meant "close"
"Artemis lad the slain bishop" I think you meant "laid"
"there was a black night" I think you meant "knight"

"Stalemate, if you like." Hm, I don't like that metaphor. Because it means something exact in chess, and this isn't it. You could say "The best he could hope for like this was a stalemate." or something like that, but... as is, it just jars me slightly.

"“What are you going to do when you lost her too, Artemis?”" Tense changes half way through. "when you lose"

I love the flicker where Young!Artemis becomes Holly for a moment. That's very cool.

"why don’t you sit down and not the move I just make" I'm not sure what this is meant to be, but I'm sure it's a typo of some sorts.

"Thing and intricate, a silver crown" I think you mean thin

And the ending - beautiful. I didn't quite follow the transition into it, but that's fine for the style of piece. You really have a gift with language and your carefully turned phrases and lyrical style are just a joy to read. I seem to have highlighted a lot of typos, but never mind, now you know they're there, I'm sure they'll be gone soon! But all in all, I love this fic. The subject matter is very cool, and the dreamlike sense all the way through is just... unbeatable. Well done.

Well, erm, I loved this!

I loved the imagery; I loved the begining which really sucked me in; and I loved the concept - which, despite what you said, I felt was developed in a unique anf frankly brilliant way.44

There was a few points where I thought it became a bit cliche. And there were definitely a few oints where the sentence structure needed a bit of polishing.

But, stil, fantastic!

*Runs off to nom this for Orion.*

Really good. I espcially like Artemis the Goddess.

wow. this was really amazing. you ahve talent.i haven't read all the artemis books but i think i sorta understand to some extent. im gonna read all the books then come back and read this again!