I love your work! I read all the FD series and cant wait for the next one. Your take on their romance is very sweet. Just a tip: you seem to have some problems with homopones and other minor spelling and gramatical errors. All in all, keep up the good work!

Found this story and i loved it! good job :)

A good fic. Though there are a few points I feel I should point out:
1) Aurra Sing & Assaj Ventress are both Dathomirians.
2) Padme is supposed to be a strong, independant and capable woman; you made her look like a weak damsel in distress who's always being kidnapped and can do nothing but wait to be rescued.
3) You missed out several characters such as Captain Rex & Ahsoka Tano (who should be included if your adding Clone Wars characters like Ventress).
4) The ending was a bit rushed.
5) You made Anakin to be more powerful than in canon despite having only a few years training compaired to canon's 13 years as a jedi.

Overall, a good story. but it could use some work.

Obi-Wan hiding this relationship cannot be a good thing. I mean look how that turned out for Anakin originally.

Still it's a good thing he has some one.

Alright, I've just finished your story and I am thoroughly impressed with what you've done.

Unfortunately there are still some areas that need improving;

First off you've used phrases like screamed too many times. I noticed it more towards the end where Anakin was fighting Sidious. Words like 'roared' and 'yelled' give a little more flavour to what you're trying to say. The repetition becomes slightly annoying and frustrating. We already know that Anakin and Padme are upset -you don't have to tell us that they're screaming every few sentences.

Another note is how characters react. Anakin is a passionate perspn, but that doesn't mean he'd get upset so easily. On that note, Lea seems almost like a flat character. Try to work on your character development and put some thought into rewriting things when you've improved in the years to come.

All that said, a really good read and well done on the story. I hope I didn't sound rude, I just want to help you improve. And I hope you rewrite this story in the future as you grow as a writer.

Excellent work!

DeepWriter

That was such a good story, I really enjoyed reading it.

Like the story so far although I don't think it is wise idea for padme to try to get pregnant when people re trying to kill them, I think you should have done the pregnancy as a accident.

Great Story!

This story is amazing, but I strongly disagree w/ u for killing the clones! When the Jedi discovered the codes u could of had them deactivate the Order 66 programming.

That was soo awesome! I loved it! :)

question unrelated with the chapter: why do you bear such a dislike for Mace Windu? don't get me wrong, he can be a right prick sometimes, but... why? yeah, i kind of noticed how you paint him as opposing Anakin in all he chooses... or is it just that he's prejudiced against change? 'cause everyone's stories seem to say that he's completely set against Anakin...

*raises eyebrow*

you copied Obi Wan's showdown with Grievous, didn't you?

good job! i'd NEVER be able to copy a scene from Star Wars for another character.

HOLY CRAP DOOKU'S TRYING TO BE A GOOD GUY!

/sighs/ I don't like it. The Clones are used and killed. All of them had personality, some of them had names, they were good soldiers etc. etc.

I Your story Palpatine was dead, but Dooku's alive. No choice.

Anakin and Padme are TOO perfect...

Sorry for this little babbling.

interesting story but... why the hell did they surrender? Why didn't leave?

and a major plothole for the beginning of the story: obi wan couldn't have known about the cloners ... because the shape shifter assassin wasn't killed by the bounty hunter...