Sniff...Sniff...Sniff

WAH!

(good story)

Wow. This is just... amazing. I'm afraid I'm not really a good constructive reviewer, but I just wanted to say how much this affected me. All the little details, everything... you just packed so much emotion into this story. The second person POV really makes an impact, and the second to last line made me tear up.

Just... wow.

Hello. Got over your story and would like to drop a review.

At the beginning of the battle between the persona's Charizard and the Champion's Venusaur, I don't recall the persona mentioning the type advantage his pokemon had. Must be that his experience over his journey has taught him not to underestimate an opponent.

I liked some of your lines, like this one: "The flame washes over skin and plant like a giant tide..." Really nice how you used the characteristics of water to describe a flame!

This succession of short paragraphs made me all the more aware of the persona's horror after the battle:

"Please...
Don’t let anything be wrong.
It can’t go wrong.
It’s not right, it’s not fair.
He’s just fainted, that’s all. Nothing more.
Nothing more…"

Also, in the part where Nurse Joy rushes into the operating rom, these questions were really haunting: "How would she know that your Charizard hates to be alone with people he doesn’t know? ... How would she know that he hates needles? ... If he wakes up, will she know how to handle him? Can she comfort him like you do when he’s frightened or sad?" Something about these questions really heightened the emotion. I guess it's because they show how the persona really knew his Charizard.

Go Mama Blissey! Go blast those insensitive reporters and bludgeon those trainers! xD

The ending gave me goosebumps. There was something poignant about recalling their escapades while scattering his Charizard's ashes. It revealed a rich past that was shared prior to the defining moment.

Hmm... regarding the unconventional POV, I think what it did for me was put me straight into the heart of the persona, so much so that as I went through the fic, each memory, feeling, and thought eventually became mine. Maybe it's why I could feel the persona's horror, disbelief, and pain. The POV and tense may be uncommon, but I think whoever decides to continue reading despite this gets beautifully rewarded at the end of the story.

It was a wonderful read. My heart clenched at a lot of parts. This may be a story that was completed a few years ago, but I'm glad I was able to read it. :D

~Ryan L

Oh... this is so good. I feel so sad about Charizard's death... but I love how you went over some good and funny moments at the end. That was nice. Much better than a cesspool of angst and bitterness.

Beautiful. The companionship you portrayed between the pokemon and the trainer is so sweet and tender. You captured the trainer's sorrow so well. I'm especially touched that charmeleon evolved into his final form to save his trainer. It's just so sad and stunning.

truly a very wonderful piece, but extremely sad. reading this has officialy made mine a somber evening. No insults or critisisms, i loved this just fine and cant imagine what you should change. very deep and sentimental, it was a terrific read and the whole story captured my complete attention. Im going to go cheer myself up, now ^^. Great work!

Oh...
I loved this. It's the best way I can think of to make me feel good about my beloved Charizard Szeren, who died about eight months ago. Thank you for writing such a lovely story; has this experience happened to you as well?

Dammit, this still makes me cry like a baby and it's like the fourth or fifth time I've read it.

I swear, I've never read a piece of published fiction that comes anywhere close to affecting me as much emotionally as this does. How do you do that? I want your talent with manipulating a reader's emotions. God knows I need it.

Oh wow. That was really, really amazing. Great work.

Great story!

that was so sad... but i'd think i'd be sader if Joe died {Joe is my flareon in FrieRed}

The writing style was interesting, and it seemed fit the story well. There were a few minor flaws (such as repetitiveness) but nothing too major.

The paragraph beginning "You don’t know that it was the Blissey that was humming a sleep-song outside your door..." seems to detract from the flow (and tone) of the passage though.

Overall, a great fanfiction.

Beautiful.

:)

That's all I can say to this.

Hm, this was a very well written fanfiction.

I enjoyed it a lot, though i'm pretty sure i wasn't meant to "enjoy" it really... you know what i mean.

I don't think that i've read your fics, no? I'm gonna be looking through them... something in this fic makes me want to read the others. Not many fics these days leave much impact, but you did very well in this.

Please continue writing... You had some good in this.

Keep up the awesome work dude!

~SaiyanLegend

OHMYGOSH!! THAT WAS... SAD!

Really. It was. It was good. You even made me cry a little... -sniffle- I could really feel all the emotion... you want to know how you did with this writing style? Awesome, that's how. You did awesome.

It was really, really, really, really good. I felt as if it was happening to me, which I suppose was the point, as it is with most second-person stories(which, by the way, are not allowed on this website. But I won't tell if you won't.:)). Really good. Really sad.

Due to the fact that I can no longer utter any coherant sentence out of excitement, I will end now. But it is really, really good.

Keep it up!!

-Lizzie