OMG that was brilliant, gotta love jayne, the big ape of a man finally falling in love its so sweet, id love to be his woman.

Cant wait to read more

Cheers :)

Nice!

Nice

Nice!

Nice

Very nice!

Nice!

Nice

Great pick on Jayne's serenade. I checked out the last verse. This is so good. Gritty and sexy and both in a good way. Again, love that all of the characters are so very in voice. And also love, love the escalating "noticing" between Jayne and Larji. The last line is great. Warmed my blood.

Now I'm just hearing the story like it's a nice long wonderful episode. I love that I can actually SEE them speaking the dialogue and playing out the action in my mind. I really can't say what's my favorite part of this (or the last) chapter-I'd be recounting the whole thing.

A long time ago, I read one of your stories and e-mailed myself to read them all. Then life happened. And then it happened again and brought me back to your stories list. I perused this earlier today, and even though-for better or perverse-I'm a Rayne fan and don't really like to read anything about them ending up with anyone else, I really loved what I read and decided to come back tonight and enjoy the whole thing.

First, I love Ilargia. You have a wonderful knack for creating not Other Characters by full-out personas. And she is definitely a fully developed "person".

I like to "hear" writing in my head when I read, and yours is so wonderfully unique, sometimes I hear this story read by a stuff Englishman and in some parts by a young, seductive Jamaican woman. I don't know how to explain that. But the characters (from the show) I hear in their own voices. It's just a wonderful, rich, complex, funny and deep story. And this is only chapter two.

I also appreciate how well you've captured River and Jayne. River is mad on the show and sometimes delightfully so. I can only imagine that would be more the case after Miranda. She is not, as so often portrayed, flighty and insipid. I love her wit here, more in keeping with her brattish humor and intellect. And your Jayne IS sexy because Adam Baldwin just is but also because I think your Ilargia brings that out in him. I love how irritated he is when everybody interrupts their conversation as if he can't be trusted to be alone with her.

Besides Ilargia and Jayne's totally innocent conversations, Mal's warnings, the foreplay of knife sharpening and Jayne's "My pleasure" (Mmm) and Ilargia eyeing him up like tasty steak, I think my favorite line from this chapter is River's totally sisterly (and fairly accurate) opinion of Simon: "Her brother really is too stupid to live."

I think this story is tasty steak.

I love your stories.

It's the first time I've read this one, but I have love your characterizations and the bits of poetry in your phrasing.

And the best thing about this story - Jayne was still Jayne! I utterly adored this, especially with Jayne being all lovesick in the beginning, it was incredibly cute and less than manly but it never felt wrong for Jayne.

Mal got to be a bit of an ass, Zoe got to be the voice of reason, River got to be crazy and poor Simon and Kaylee had trouble catching a break. It didn't feel like anybody was left out of the story and I enjoyed that we got some action toward the end to make it exciting as well as smooshy! :-D

I liked Ilargia (though it took me a while to decide how to pronounce her name) and I thought her internal arguments against liking Jayne sounded a lot like my own - I'm a professional, sophisticated (ha! right!) woman; I'm a feminist, I shouldn't fancy a space-troll like him! (Incidentally, I'm totally stealing that for any future Firefly conversations I have, it's so much better than ape-gone-wrong.)

I just hope you *have* written a sequel or I might cry.

On a completely separate note, I note you haven't written any Chuck fic - I would have thought you would be all over that - Casey is just *dying* to have his cold heart melted! Not your thing? (Not that I'm complaining, you've already spoiled us with great Firefly fic and the best Sheldon/Penny fic evar.)

This chapter is hilarious - Jayne's skin being a tone lighter, the chess, the book 'discussion' between Mal and Ilargia. Laughed my socks off through all that and was still giggling by the end. Also, very true about Grendel and we know Jayne's mother loves him. She knits him cunning hats :-D

there is only one wat to discribe this fanfiction it is an OUTSTANDING story well done