What the ** did you name her Kitty for, that's so retarded. Otherwise it was interesting.

~CAC

Aw. That was really cute!

I thought it was a cute story. I liked the little scene with her refusing to do her work.

It was great but too short.

shut up yourself!! really we are all tired of you mumbling on this blog about your weak story line. all i can suggest to you is to try and come up with your own ideas, for once. G

Oh, that was good! I love reading stories about Snape, and seeing this side of him was a real treat! I think there is no better combination than Slytherin and Gryffindor together, too!

Sorry and all, but nothing about this story is remotely believable. Dumbledore would hardly be over the moon about Snape hooking up with a student when she was only sixteen years old, then marrying her when she was no more than seventeen or eighteen. Plus, your main female character is the finest example of a Mary Sue I've seen in a long time. Your writing itself isn't actually that bad, so I don't want to sound too mean because I think you have potential as a writer, but the characters of Mary Sues are just so grating and false that I found it hard to enjoy this story.

One-shot or not, you should really never include a Mary Sue character in your story. Kitty is a genius, has long blonde hair, blue eyes, has the best traits from every house and even tames Severus Snape. Puh-lease. It would be more realistic for your main character to be a midget with Down Syndrome and lupus than to be that utterly perfect.

Even if you meant this story in jest, it's extreme to claim that Dumbledore was perfectly supportive of Snape ** a sixteen-year-old student.