Roy is not a happy man right now. He's so angry, he isn't aware that his glove was sparking. Glad he didn't accidentally set the train on fire.

I love how when Roy entered the hospital room and Ed automatically thought he was going to die. It's funny to me. And Hawkeye's earlier comment on not killing anyone till she was there to witness it. Priceless. Ronald should be very nervous right now.

Ah. Roy and Ron confrontation. Thank you Mustang for knocking Ron down a few notches. His arrogance was getting a tad annoying. His views on Rose need to be re-arranged also. Though Roy will make sure enough.

Ah! Right after Al went back into the room, the Ronald bonfire began. Where's those smores damn it!? And I expect at least one hot dog out of this! Haha!
Note: Flamed him in a hospital! How'd he get away with that I wonder?

Roy's answer to Ed's question! "What happened to the other guy?" "He's been taken care of." So vague, but the meaning is clear. He's a burnt wiener, Ed. You missed the bonfire, unfortunately.

I understand the Elrics fear. If Roy Mustang was glaring at me because I let his sister get into harm's way, I'd be scared stiff. Psycho over-protective brother! Reminds me of my own brother. Haha!

"You two should better than most. Emotional wounds scar just as much as physical ones." I think 'know' is missing from this sentence.

Roy's reaction to Rose's new haircut is hilarious. 'I didn't care that I killed Ron, but now I'm happy about it!' Apparently only Roy has hair touching privileges. Good for him.

'What!' Roy's reaction to Rose's like of her short hair: Priceless. I happen to like boyish haircuts on girls. I think it's sexy. Haha! A heart attack over hair? Or was it over the large knife used to cut the hair? I forget.

Typewriter go boom! Haha! Note: Secretly try to pack it? How the hell do you fit a typewrite in a suitcase?

"I wasn't sitting on the typewriter Roy, I was sitting on the suitcase." That still qualifies as sitting on the typewriter.

No major mistakes hear. Overall a very funny chapter. Love it.

First thought "YAY!! Ed's ok!" Apparently my mind is a hyped up teenage who abuses exclamation points.

Haha, Lust is a funny one. 'I'm not interested in killing you so I'll just leave you to bleed to death.' It's practically the same thing.

"For a moment, Rosette let the mask drop, letting Edward see depth of the soul wound she'd been hiding since that night." This sentence does not sit well with me. Something's wrong with it that I can't seem to figure out.

"As Al says, I'm reckless. It's not the first time I got in this state," Minor mistake: *I've gotten in this state.

Edward does have a point. Compassionate people don't usually blackmail. Unless the information they have is juicy! Haha!

Oh I feel sorry for Edward. Winry is going to hit him over the head with her wrench so hard he'll be unconscious for the rest of the year. I don't want to be on the end of her anger, no sir.

Alphonse is so cute. I want to hug him. Oh Ed is such a bastard, but he is very justified in telling Roy what was left out. Anyone for a Ronald bonfire? Care for some smores? Maybe a even wiener while we're at it? Haha! Even after telling Roy, the flame alchemist is still mean to Ed. Poor Edward.

Mustang is going to fuck someone up, pardon my language there. And it's not going to be Ed.

Again well written. Not many mistakes, just what I've mentioned above. On to the next chapter. Oh such fun I'm having with this.

Haha! Be aware I wrote this while reading. So it might not make all that much sense.

I still don't like Ronald. He needs to be body checked... by a hockey player. Nobody touches a writer's notebook or they may end up losing an appendage.
The interaction between Ron and Rosette amuses my despite the angry lacing it. I can definitely feel the tension and hear the anger. Edward seems ready to kill Ronald. How he hasn't yet is beyond me.
"What may the normal amount of food for one person might not be the normal amount for someone else." You're missing a 'be' in there.
Ronald seems a bit corny to me. He is such a fake gentleman it's annoying. And Rosette should not follow strangers. Haha. Bad choice there, going with that healer guy, Robert I believe his name is. Reminds me of that priest guy from early episodes of the show. Ed and Al do not seem happy to see him. I say kick his ass boys.
Note: I think Lust is just awesome.
Oh lord! The ending to this chapter is not a bright one. Now that this has happened I must read the rest. I need to know what happens next.
Overall, a very good chapter. Well written with only minor mistakes.

First off, I'd like to say I love Full Metal Alchemist. And that you've written the characters quite well. None seem to be out of character, to me anyway. The name Rosette reminds me of My-Hime for some reason.

Chapter 1

I must say, Roy is my favorite character simply because he can set you on fire with a snap of his fingers. The phone call he had with his sister was entertaining. Got a good laugh out of that. The interaction Roy had with the Elrics was perfectly done. If I remember the show correctly, that's how all they're encounters went. It was funny.

Chapter 2

Ronald seems like a right bastard. I want to punch him. He's not very gentlemanly. I hope Edward teaches him a lesson and that Roy sets him on fire. It's a very well written chapter. One or two mistakes that I've noticed. One: Use commas between the names. I know you normally do, but you missed a few. Ex: ' "Yes, my name is Rosette Edward." She replied.' It sounds as though Edward is her last name. Two: This sentence; "He wouldn't admit how worried he was worried about them." you have an extra 'worried' in there.

Other than that, nicely done chapter. It pulls me in.

An excellent chapter! I'm assuming TQ-chan did Edward since the in-character-ness was amazing. Ronald seems like a very interesting character (I can't remember anything from the first chapter, so this may be a repeated comment). I like how he invades Rose's personal space and appears to show a genuine caring side before going back around to a more sinister, controlling side. I wonder what happened to Rose's leg... I'd assume Roy has something to do with it, since that's what's implied.

There were some grammar issues here and there, but I didn't recall anything regarding spelling or punctuation for the most part. There was one part that should have been italicized because it was Ed's thoughts, but it didn't really disrupt my reading. It's been a while since I've watched FMA in length, but I'd say Al's in-character-ness could use some work every now and then. Other than that, great job!

Good story, but you should put more Roy-angst & stuff in it

YAY! Ive been waiting for an update!! PLease continue!!

Yay! It's finally done! It's longer than I thought it was, too.

I think this chapter is our best yet...despite the whole taking however many months thing...

There were a few mess-ups and earlier, you forgot to use italics for the thoughts, but it's still a greatly written chapter. XD

Wow...this is very long. lol.

I noticed a few grammar errors and typos though.

'Ok, I can mange that...' -- I'm sure you meant "manage."

I can't really comment much on the overall writing since I helped write it. XD

I like the ending results.

hmm please continue

hey update please its good. so wat happened to rose's legs!? And when is ronald goning to die or seriousky hurt cuz you did a very god job in describing a bastard. Well hope you update soon!

PLEASE UPDATE I REALLY LIKE THIS STORY SO FAR!

hey I haven't forgotten you. I know its like I fell off the face of the earth..there has been a LOT going on. I really like the story so far..you had me laughing every few lines. i was hallarious! Great job.

RM here, just wanted to say love your story so far and eagerly awaiting the next chapter! By the way I love and feel like I'm really similar to Rosette!

Wonderful! Finally a Fullmetal Alchemist story from you two! I saw a few grammatical and tense variation errors, but they aren't something you should really worry about. I especially love how Ed and Roy came out. Ed, as always, is very sarcastic and filled of pint-sized comedy lines while Roy is uptight, yet showing his other side well due to the wording. Not to mention I adore Al. He's the coolest guy around, you know? X3

This was long and excellent (I love long chapters btw) and I look forward to an update in the future! Please take your time on it!