Beautiful and poignant. Glad to hear that this is not a one shot:)

Wow, absolutely lovely beginning. The writing is so eloquent and it's a real pleasure to read.

Your writing, and this story in particular, reminds me of Stephen King. I don't mean that it's dark (although it is, in a different kind of way). It's the style, the repetitiveness, the bluntness. It's difficult to master, but you've done it brilliantly.

ot holds the promise of at least a few chapters of pleasurable reading.