Fairly good, but WHY mix english with Japanese? Pointless :

Wow! I really really liked this story! But why did the lemon get deleted? Or even taken down in the first place? I bet it was awsome! :D

This was a good story. I loved it.

it was a good story! just one tad bit of advice... it seemed kind of rushed. other than that it was GREAT!

lemon! that was a nice oneshot... I can't write oneshots... unless they're really really long... like 12 chapters long! Can I have the lemon?

deleted lemon seriously (looks hopeful) can I please see it please
Egypt- oh boy well that was good really good
EgyptMotou- hey I'm suppose to give the review not my OC
Egypt- to bad I can have a say to
EgyptMotou- hmpf
Egypt- anyways good job we'd really like to see this deleted lemon we LOVE lemons
EgyptMotou- you do just alittle too much

Is it just me or did that start in one direction and end up in another? The first bit and last were good its just they didn't fit together...maybe there's supposed to be more to this...?

oh great story! i would love to see the deleted lemon. *gives chocolate and pats on back*

Hey that was good can I have whatever your suposed to request tho? I just wanna check it out okies!! Check me out to if ya wanna read I almost suck...almost...well never mind thanks alot ;)

Good stroy are you still on hiatus? I would love to see the deleted lemon!

This was a very good story. It sucks that you had to take out the lemon part though. I would like to view it if you don't mind. Just send it to my email. Thanks. Keep up the good work.:) Je Ne

that was hot. it was so great! XD ...a strawberry? oh my...oh god i have some in my fridge! XD

i would love to see the lemon! please?

great story! thanks for posting it so we could read it!

It was good, but if you're going to write a fanfiction in English then I would suggest you leave out the random Japanese inserts. ;-) Otherwise, it was pretty good. Keep writing and improving.
Cheers.

Well...this story was definitely edited. It probably had a good flow and resolution of the ENTIRE set-up of the angsty Yuugi-hates-me thing, but this is just sort of... 'Hmm, poor Yuugi must hate me. Yuugi! Kon'nichi wa, let's sex each other up!' And it didn't even have a very entertaining lemon for THAT part of it.

So, what I mean (in a very roundabout way) is that, yes, I would like to read the original. ^.^

aw!superkawaii!
plez send me the lemon [i weep 4 u] 2