Not bad. Not bad at all. I acually have an idea for an alternate ending to STD. If you think I should write it let me know. Keep up the good work. Peace

great story, i enjoyed it.

wow thats a pretty nice story considering its was your first kp fic i liked it alot very nice job keep up the good work! peace!

I read this because of a discussion in another forum about how either Kim or Ron tends to get wimpified in a lot of fanfictions. I think Ron took the hit here, although not too badly. It isn't clear if he really has less than average intelligence or is just lazy.

In re the work itself, I think I agree with the other reviews. The pacing is slow because you spell out everything in too much detail, sometimes twice. You need a little more faith in the readers' ability to fill in the picture.

KiY

great fic. the pacing needs a bit of work. but all in all that's a great story.

I really like the concept you've got going here, but honestly, It's kind of hard to read. The big thing is, don't use their names so much. Kim this, Kim that. Ron this, Ron that. All you need to do is use references to them a little more, like 'he', 'she', 'him', and 'her'. I really do applaud you though for what seems like a unique idea, at least to me. I haven't seen anything else like this out there. Keep it up. I'm sure you will improve!