 brucasfanatic 2006-05-17 . chapter 1Hey!! this is really awsome!! :D I just reviewed your other oth story and this one is written just as well!! I really do love the way you're able to capture the characters' feelings. Its awsome. Just some things that would make this better: Don't write both peyton and Lucas's thoughts the exact same way. I know that they're friggen clones of each other and think, act, talk, dress, walk and everything else alike but this chapter had a lot of repetition. Which you should avoid doing. :) also make it longer!! i wanna know how you're going to take this! :D Anyways, its awsome so far!
UD SOON! |