|Reviews for Creation|
| kenihiko 12/16/06 . chapter 4
i like this. finially stupid me got around to reading one of your stories. i've got to check out more. .x
| lolo popoki 11/14/06 . chapter 4
Finally getting around to giving this an actual review. ;; You know how I feel about it already, but it never hurts to repeat. I really enjoyed this chapter. :) The part in the beginning describing the aftermath of festivities was nicely rendered, and Hiko's rather incoherant excitement was extremely amusing to me. The bit at the end was also well done, with the interspersing of past and present. Great job, as always :) *hugs* Can't wait to read more! And, once again, you're welcome for any help... though I can't really remember being all that helpful here...
| White Rabbit Tale 11/13/06 . chapter 4
Heehee, I knew from the title of the chapter that this one would be that much easier to understand.
Why is it everytime Kenshin gets hit on, I find it hilarious? Be it a male or a female, the notion of someone being sexually interested in him is enough to chuckle over. Especially if it's a guy. Poor Kenshin.
Oh the dialogue at the end is too delicious! I love the how completely Kenji contradicts his father's words, and you showed it rhythmically and almost poetically. I like the phrases that almost echo each other "I will NOT be denied" "I will NOT" is especially great. It already says so much about the parallels between Kenshin and his son, and the differences.
Probably this is my favorite chapter so far, though I still really like the first one.
| monsoonblues 11/11/06 . chapter 4
Saleh!This was my favourite chapter so far. An absolute treat to read. Your description of the city while Kenshin nervously walks through it, the brief exchange between Hiko and Kenshin, they demand the reader to savour each and every word. I've read very few stories which elicit that level of visualization in my head. I like how you juxtapose father and son's differing points of view in the end. There's nothing I don't like in this. It's lovely, your writing even better. I hope you update soon. I'm REALLY looking forward to what comes next.
Again, I just can't stop raving about how you can manage to avoid long rambling sentences and still express situations and settings so vividly.
Thank you so much for that wonderful read:)
| omasuoniwabanshi 11/5/06 . chapter 4
Great description of Kyoto after a night of revelry. The banners, the litter, and the sun driving people into shade, all gave a realistic feel to the scene along with a touch of humor (poor Kenshin! Had to smile at the catcalls)
The scene where Kenshin comes to visit Hiko was too cute for words. I like the way he had difficulty telling his ex-master the reason for his visit, making him guess, which he did. He is Hiko after all, and not exactly slow on the uptake.
The progress from past to present, culminating in the scene where Kenji's words were interspersed with Hiko's memories of Kenshin's words from the past, wasn't confusing at all. The fact that Kenshin's words were italicized and Kenji's were not helped a lot as well.
Very good job!
| MultipleCyrosis 11/5/06 . chapter 4
Pinoykengumi7 here... (too lazy to sign on to my own account... so I'll just use my brother's. Just don't reply to this one _ ;) ANyway, whee everything it getting a bit more into place. And your writing is very good. I liked the interaction between Kenshin and Hiko _- Hehe, Hiko's egotistical attitude is quite amusing :P But yeah, heh, good first chapter! Even though I don't really like Kenji that much... (he just never really appealed to me) And it's good to know that you've researched stuff well _ Anyway, laters... I gotta go back to studying 'Jane Eyre' for English..._"" I have 3 exams tomorrow [English, Jap and Maths] and I'm probably going to fail them all XD Laters then _V
| skenshingumi 11/4/06 . chapter 4
I must admit I was confused by the earlier chapters. There was a lot in this one that I really liked. I thought your description of Kenshin walking through Kyoto was great. I loved the way you use the festival to recall Kenshin's turbulent past and the snes eof death haunting the streets. "The nearly dead heaps, the stench of bodies, the odd grunts and the overpowering acrid quality of the very air..." capture the images of the Bakumatsu even if they are ostensibly about the festival. Even the earlier phrase, the "flurry of red and gold" recalls images of Kenshin in action in the streets of Kyoto.
I also thought the weaving of Kenji's call for training, not to be denied, with Kenshin's almost painfully hopeful plans for the future gave power to the scene. I loved Kenshin’s line, “He will rise to his feet unsupported by a sword, sheathed or otherwise.” It’s as if all Kenshin’s dreams of what he fought for were summed in these statements and each is undercut by Kenji’s own desires.
| pinoykengumi7 10/26/06 . chapter 3
Heh, yes, I'm back... [[been studying for yearlies and caught up in other work _""]] Short, but well written chapter. Um, again, I'm having trouble. Who is the girl...? _ -I'm stupid- I'm sort of lost -cries- GOMEN!
But I still think that your writing style is exceptional! Keep up the good work,
| monsoonblues 10/19/06 . chapter 3
From what I could discern though, Hiko is indeed different (I'm a rocket scientist aren't I?) but good different, he doesn't seem out of character necessarily, and I liked the little exchange between him and the young lady. As for the rest of it, I'm afraid you'll have to explain it to me. Forgive me I'm really slow.
*hangs head in abashment*
| monsoonblues 10/19/06 . chapter 2
The first paragraph of this chapter: beautiful, and extremely apt. Not that the rest of it isn't good, this story just gets better, but I loved that most about this chapter, other than the part where you describe the chase and swift battle. I'm a bit slow about these things, but am I to assume that the boy who was saved by the Shishou is Kenshin? Again, I love your descriptions, they're unsually vivid. Reading this is like watching a movie play in my head. With subtitles. Great work:)
| monsoonblues 10/19/06 . chapter 1
Once again, I'll have to comment on your style of writing, it can be abrupt and still flow like a song, your tendency to use comparisons instead of merely stating the obvious is something I really admire and like. I like your description of Kenshin's thoughts on the lullaby, and how clear it is where Kenji (hopefully I correctly assumed it's Kenji) is heading when you end with 'the little shack atop the mountain'. I was a little confused about the part that said “Us, needs me; we need us” but other than that, this is a very good first chapter. I'm sorry if this seems nasty, I just wanted to make it a well-rounded thing...
| pinoykengumi7 10/10/06 . chapter 2
Saleh, I feel stupid. I think this is too complicated for me -.- But the way how you write it is well. Nothing wrong with that - just me..._"
| White Rabbit Tale 10/8/06 . chapter 3
Still very confusing but, as always, your wonderful descriptive language has drawn me in. And yes, I still dislike your font styling abuse, but it's okay. I'll get over it.
I am going to feel very smart when I finally get what's going on in these stories...as you have repeatedly reminded me "it's more than one story!"
In any case, even if I have no idea what it's all about, the whimsical use of words is captivating and I find no chore in the task of reading onward. I also liked your female OC in this chapter. I am guessing this is very early in Hiko's life...very interesting. I hope to see more (and I hope to see more clarified!) soon. I have a feeling this is going to be very fun to read, having to figure out how it all connects.
| pinoykengumi7 10/7/06 . chapter 1
Saleh. What can I say. This is written really well. WAH SO GOOD! And it seems so realistic... but short 0.o;; Ehh... and at the beginning, where you have the prelude, is it really meaning to be 'begging'? Or beginning? Anyway, laters I'm off to read the next chapter.
| omasuoniwabanshi 10/7/06 . chapter 3
Whoever this 'very different Hiko' is, I like him! His gyrfalcon appears to adore him as well - which is a huge point in his favor. He didn't let the 'young lady' mess with him, which shows strength of character, and he cares about his mom. What's not to like?
The descriptions were great as usual, especially the line:
"He followed the deepening shadow like it was his path"
I loved that. Good chapter!