Every 38 fic is always a good read ) I hope you'll be encouraged to write more. I personally think it will be better if you would describe more so the reader could visualize the scene. Once a very good fanfic writer told me that too. She reminded me that we're not writing drama, and I find it a big help. I'm still working on it, and believe me, practise makes it better _

Hmm... very interesting way of writing it. Very different. I like it! I'm mixed about this one, though. ON the one hand, I'm glad it was edited and left like this. But on the other... the dirty, perverted fangirl in me was really looking forward to a teensy bit more. Hehehe... dirty girl, that's me!

Anyway, it looks like one little typo at the beginning, where there's a #1 jumbled in. I'm pretty sure that wasn't supposed to be there. And maybe just a couple more descriptive lines (not sexy stuff... though I'm not opposed to that *grins*), but not a crazy amount. Like I said, this was a very interesting way of writing it, so hugs to you! *hugs*