W00t. Smart girl.

HAHAH!
That story was good :) kinda random at spots... but still good! YAY!
Those credits were hilarious! HAhahAHA!
Now i'm off to read the sequel!

-Albino Coconut23

Hey, i don't have an account so i'm leaving this kind of review thingy!! I really love your story and it's amazing so don't get me wrong when i say your character is turning into a bit of a mary sue (a little miss perfect) it may be that i haven't read into the story far enough but that's not important, this is an amazing story and i really LOVE IT! i'm so glad we share the same views that will is a pretty boy snob and jack is the hot pirate! THis is a great story
Sarah

I thought that chap was wierd but funny. Keep it up! You should make a sequle. Dont mind my horrible spelling please. I like your story a lot. You should make a guy with some wierd object meet Crevan. anyho...keep up your terribly funny chapters!

Man, Bitten by a cow, you really suck. You need to get a better name. Your story is crap. My five year old sister can write better than you!I hope this makes you a humble person

No offense, but you need to cut down on the mushy fluffy stuff! And Aravis needs to be tougher. Sorry if your mad!realy am!

hey again! nice chap, but you need 2 things: pirate lingo and more talking,less explaining! anyhoo... nice chap over all. Keep em coming!!

I thought that chap was pretty sweet. I think you should be mean to Jack in a funny way. Like Aravis playing some cruel pranks for friendly fun. Discribe Aravis in your story better like if shes tall short black white brown hair black hair what?
anyways love your story so far! good luck!

Oh wow!! That's the stupidest thing I ever read!! Good job!! (shakes head) Crevan and her boxes...ha ha! "Box angels"!! Funny! ;D

Hmm...I think this ending is the best. Yeah. Mondo coolio! Ha ha! Keanu the camel moving sets? That's a funny picture! ;D

Yay more updates very good story Update soon

Hey Mary. I am finally reviewing your story, just like I promised. But I will be brutal. Can you TAKE IT?!?!?! I hope so. Well, here goes.

“Aye! Sir, a man with a red bandana and a big hat just stole Mr. Douglas’ purse!”
How can he see Jack's red bandana when he has a big hat on? If the dude's in the crow's nest, he's getting a bird's eye view of Jack. He wouldn't be able to tell if he had a red bandana on underneath the hat.

"Captain Sparrow was soon in a chase, running, swimming, a few short duels-Jack won momentarily because he had been through the same sort of situation more than one before-until he finally ducked into a nearby smithy."
Your verbs aren't consistent there... And I think you meant "once before", not "one before".

"...but Jack, being the better swordsman, quickly got the other man on his knees."
"Had", not "got".

"Suddenly Jack felt a sword slide over his throat, and hold itself conveniently in the middle."
"Hold itself conviently in the middle"? What does that even mean?

"He had a turban wrapped around his face like a mask."
Turbans are hats. They are not worn around the face like a mask.

"He grabbed Jack and pulled him up onto a loft above the shop itself, and threw him down."
Unless Arav, who I'm assuming will turn out to be AraVIS, is a weightlifter, she would not be able to hoist Jack into the loft. People are heavy. Not to be lifted lightly. I think I just made a pun.

"It was much like an attic, but a bit smaller."
That's an unnecessary sentece. People know what lofts are. It's like describing a refrigerator to them or something. They already know!

"The first was that Arav was horribly slender, and Jack almost thought he might be anorexic."
Now I might be wrong on this, but I don't think anorexia was a big problem in the time when Pirates is set. It certainly wasn't commonplace. I serioulsy doubt Jack would know about it. So I would recommend not having him think someone looks like they suffer from a disease he doesn't even know exists.

“I was the third swabby, a new recruit."
I don't think swabbies were first, second, etc. I think they were just plain old swabby, no number attatched (I could be wrong, though).
"Captain Amos Barbossa picked me, but didn’t listen to my suggestions. I regret the mutiny, and I regret marooning you. I didn’t even want to, but Barbossa couldn’t give a crap about what I thought.”
Not sure if first mate has "picking" powers, but I'm not gonna make a big deal of that. However, I don't think people said "give a crap" in the time period you're writing.

“No. We should steal a boat that will take us out of the bay, then we sail to Tortuga, get a crew, sail back and I’ll buy it for you. As a gift of repentance.”
Why do they have to get a crew and steal a boat? Why doesn't she just buy it if she has the money? Or why don't they just steal the Pearl? Why go back and forth? That's silly.

“I will.” he answered.
Just a little thing here -- use a comma instead of a period in this case, like this - "I will," he answered.

"Jack put his sword into a hidden sheath on his leg."
Um, swords and their sheaths are not small and hide-able. A dagger, perhaps, could be hidden on a leg, but not a sword.

“Should we take any extra weapons?” he asked Will.
Why is Jack asking for Will's advice? He just met him!

"Arav chose a dagger that was small, but extremely sharp with deep sea blue sapphires on each side, and also the small sheath that belonged to it, and tucked it into a fold on his left thigh. Will picked a small dagger that would almost fit into a big pocket, with blazing topazes on each side, and also the sheath, and tied it to his right leg."
Was royalty coming to town? I don't think a blacksmith would keep such a supply of bejeweled daggers on hand in a little town like Port Royal. Supply and demand, my friend. If there's no one to buy purdy daggers like these, a blacksmith wouldn't make them.

OK, well, I was very brutal. You ARE off to a good start. You've just got some rough spots here and there. But don't worry too much. Pretty soon you'll be an accomplished, amazing, astonishingly good writer like ME! Maybe. If you're lucky. OK, well, I'm off to bed. Keep writing, matey!

I definitely enjoyed every chapter of the story! A little "fluff" makes a story... interesting. I really liked how you said how to put music to it... that made it fun! I liked the happy ending better (I'm such a romantic... yay, fluff!), but I'm definitely an Elizabeth+Jack person! You are a fantastic writer, your chapters kept me wanting to read until the end, your story was VERY thorough, but not too much, so keep it up!

This is (cough) awesome! It is the BEST story I've EVER read! Wow! I love it! Make more! I LOVE the fluffy ending! It's soo great to see Jack getting married! Wow! I wish I could be Aravis! Ugh! I hate Creevan! She's lyk, so annoying! And, lyk, how do you hate Will? He is lyk, so hot! I wish I could... (cough) Ugh. Reviewers, if any of you are like that, I am going to call the FF cops on you. For harrassment to a crappy story. Yeah, I know it's crappy, but at least I tried! (cough) It's soo awexome! Aw, crap! I forgot to sign out and make it anonomous! (wait...that's not how you spell it...)

this sucked