This has sort of an elegant angst to it that makes it easily rereadable. I really enjoyed it.

You might not like the formatting, but I do. The numbers are like sticks, and its more stream of conscious-y that way.

I liked how there are countables in each section. Except the last. I sort of would have liked for one of them to be playing with some countable object in the end. Even though the point is kind of that counting helps him to remember, and he forgets the date of the day they met. Still, this piece has sort of an ironic tone, and I think that would add something to it.

"I think the keeping counts more than the track" That sentence confused me a bit because I wasn't sure if you wanted to say keeping count's about more than the track or keeping count is more than keeping track or that the track is somehow countable. So yes. Lost.

It was refreshing. And a unique piece. It had a simple, but also a profound point. So thank you for updating.

So I spent a few hours hopping around your page and reading random snippets. Not enough to do you justice, but I very much enjoy your writing style (poetry as well as prose). It has this fun-loving depth to it. I'm going to go back and read things more closely and leave comments, but just letting you know that I enjoy this piece (so simple and so easy; it flows so well!) and a lot of your work (the close inspection of Dias and Claude's relationship is refreshing), and I am going to favorite you.

Even though you don't update often : ).

I wish I had a fancier way to say that I really liked reading this. :D It would be great to present you with some sort of detailed, well-written compliment.

I guess instead I'll say that what draws me in is your voice: you use the commonplace to establish the deeply personal in a way that seems real, more than realistic. But it isn't just serious; this voice works well with humor, too. I admire that more than anything.

Whitechapel

I'm so glad you've updated! It's about time I reviewed your series, and let me say that I love it! I love the way you portray Claude and Dias together! Please keep writing =]

"They were the same as yours. They must have been. Or were they."
There are a couple of sentences in here that need question marks at the end, including here. (I get the feeling that stream-of-consciousness trumps grammar in this story.) More importantly, though, I like your musing on how we take shortcuts with our memories in order to fit more information in.

Great tinkering with POV in this. First one, then the other, then I-don't-know-who. Both, maybe?

"much as how one is never quite aware of the exact moment when sleep overtakes the senses."
The reverse, however, is not true, as everyone who wakes up to an alarm knows.

You write about characters' thoughts better than I do. At least, that's the impression I get from the first paragraph of this.

The other impression I get is that you don't like babying the audience. I have to figure out what's going on by myself in order to follow the story. Sometimes that makes a story impenetrable, but here it seems to work.

Interesting piece.

I like stories with ideas behind them, especially when the story is not just an outlet for the author's ideology (since those are polemics, not stories). Here, Claude and Dias get to disagree, and the reader is left thinking, rather than believing one or the other. That's a good thing.

Poetry that doesn't make me want to claw my eyes out? That's rare. Props for writing about Star Ocean 2.

I like how I can tell who the narrator is despite no names being given.

Parallel "let me"s in the fourth stanza = nifty. You have a good ear for this.

The only line I don't like is "I've written stories... for no one to read." That's a little awkward, even for poetry. Other than that, it's a very pretty piece.

Really nice!! I love both the characters (my fave is Ashton though)