Wow, Jou playing the "bad guy" role for once instead of Kaiba. I'm shocked and delighted! Wow, it got me all choked up. Lovely. The ending killed me a little (they both love each other! But pride and fear keep them apart! Oh no! Why), but regardless, I loved it. Not all things end well and a part of me is glad this ended with sadness. Loved it. Lots. Insanely well done.

It is very sad yet so beautiful.
You must write a sequel or another oneshot where they finally return to each other.

Oh My God... *wails* that was so sad! :( man. I actually might CRY if that doesn't end on a happy note... PLEASE do a sequel or another chapter! please or I might die of heartbreak =(
lol
x x x

It remind me that qoute. Can't seem to remember the word for it. Soemthing about "set them free, if they come back is ment to be. If not, then is never were never ment to be." Men, I wish I remember the qoute was... just reading the ending. Just break my heat. It make me want to cry.

Oh, it breaks the heart. Wonderful writing, though; you can really feel the characters' pain. True, I think that Jacqueline was a little unbelievable, but meh, she's an OC.

Keep writing!

(And say, this sounds vaugly like a prequel to "Through the Eyes of a Child".)

Aw...how sad! I think, though, that the ending you put on this is perfect for a continuing storyline...just a thought...

Oh, so sad! Well written! Good work, it was a sad story but I liked it!

I hate you.
Like, seriously.
Despise.
I can't stand it when fanfics make me cry...and this one did JUST THAT.
It was...so sad and angsty and sort of sweet but still...heart wrenching.
There should be more.
It should be HAPPY at the end...gawd why do you do this!!
*Sobbing*
You are the purest of evil ;_;.

Aww. That's so sad. Great job on this story.

somthing told me it was a oneshot, like a story this could cant just make the reader happy and continue with a more happy ending. you just have to torture this poor soul and leave her to think about the actual ending...great, there's thinking envolved...anyway, this story was really good, i really enjoyed, and the poetty was amazing, i dont know if u made that up yourself, or you got it from a book, doesn't matter, it's really touching.

great job