My god, I feel like I've been burned alive and Miley Cyrus has spermed in my mouth.

WHAT THE ** IS THIS **? This is one of the WORST fanfictions I have ever read - no, scratch that, THE WORST FANFICTION I HAVE EVER READ IT.

There are so many problems with this story I'm not going to even point them out. Just go die and burn this fanfiction with you.

I slashed my wrists and poked my eyes out after reading this. I am getting blood all over my keyboard now. I am writing a letter and telling them this fanfiction killed me. You are a ** murderer! People shall ** hunt you down and chop off your none-existing dick! DIE!

OK this story was one of the most pathetic stories ive ever read. First of all, the incredibly annoying "french" 'o 'ave. 'O can 'o 'ossibly 'e 'o incompetent. But what really grinded my gears was your ignorance. If someone has been put under the imperious curse, you cant simply say decharm and everythings back to normal. Also when Harry was supposeldy stunned for an hour, don't you think that the most powerful wizard ever would know the simple spell "ennervate" (witch is the counter spell for stupify), and not wait for an hour, you make me laugh. Personally i don't think you even know what a horcrux is, "he didnt know that i found all the horcruxes and destoyed them", another proof of your ignorance. Well i dont even have to say all the grammar mistakes and misspellings youve made; Avada Kedavara, geez. I'm sorry if this makes you kill yourself but i felt that the truth had to come out. Futhermore i don't have to remind you that harry would never use the killing curse and voldemort would never let himself get killed

I assume you took 15 minutes to come up with this pathetic excuse of a story. No? Then i guess your brain work relatively less than the others out there.

First of all, your story has no plot. What little plot you have had been mercilessly butchered by your lousy characterization. There was no WHY it happened, no HOW Ginny turned dark, no WHEN she did. Then you lump Ginny and Voldy together and proclaimed them " True Love". I shudder to think what your context of "True love" is in real life. So, congratulations, you ruined a perfectly fine plot device with your brainless story, you imbecile.

As quoted
And I know for certain that a young man by the name of Nevill (with an E damnit) Longbottom loves you. He has since your Third Year. Just think.” Harry said.

I would expect it to be said by DUMBLEDORE rather than Harry. Even if you insist on Harry saying that, at least show it in some character development which i think your measly four chapters will never be able to cover. You should know that Harry is also resistant to the Imperius curse, so there is no reason why Ginny, of all people, can put him under it when Barty Crouch Jr and Voldy failed. Either erase it, or explain it and i am sure the second choice will force you to use a poorly written deux ex machina.

By the way, It is AVADA KEDAVRA. Not Abra kadabra, not avada Kadavera. Get your facts right first before you decides to defile an otherwise perfectly nice story. If you had just watch the HP movies and decides to pollute the HP fandom with that crappy inspiration of yours, you fail. Try again next time, when you have read all the BOOKS.

Well... what can I say?

That was truly abysmal.

Your characterization, in particular, made me want to cry. I'm assuming you've read at least Harry Potter book when I say, "Have you turned a blind eye to both Harry's and Ginny's personalities?" Voldemort's personality was butchered, too.
This is why, in some ways, fanfiction is much harder to write than originals: you need to write with someone else's characters, and you need to write it convincingly. You did not do this.

You seem to have grasped some major aspects of grammar, whilst leaving the 'fine-tuning' ones behind. This also made the characters less believable, because the poor punctuations adjusts their speaking to a completely foreign dialogue. You did this with Harry, Ginny and Voldemort. I suggest you revise amateur grammatics before continuing anymore fiction. I just hope in the years since you've written this, you've improved vastly.

I'm not going to even comment on your description, because you don't seem to have included much/any.

I'm terribly sorry, but that was pathetic.

Wow. Just...wow. This is without a doubt in my mind, possibly the worst pile of fetid horseshit I've ever had to slog through. Good God, I only read the first chapter, and suddenly I have this insatiable urge to burn something. Preferably your computer. Possibly you. Even both. Mazarrin was pretty much all correct. I doubt this steaming pile of centaur semen could ever be salvaged. Kindly do the lieterary world and remove anyhting you may utilize in typing, including your head. That way, none of us will ever have to suffer through your attempt at this digital syphilis.

In 163 words, you've compressed what common sense dictates that you spend thousands on. Romance takes development, but evidently, you thought "This is the digital age. Who needs romantic development?" and threw that out of the window.

And then, "’ou will stick it in me.” Fleur demanded, referring to Harry’s dick." - which triggered my 'hey WHOA! What the _**ing_ asscrack!' moment. What you consider smut I consider a torture scene. It will have traumatized better men than I.

Your mysteries are stupid. Writing a mystery does not mean throwing a plot out of the window. Instead of advancing the plot, you make us readers guess what the hell is going on.

“Harry! I’m so glad you could make it before we go looking for the H…” Hermione shouted at Harry two years later.

I missed "two years later" the first time around, and had no idea what the characters were doing.

This defies imagination and all human capacity for reason. I couldn't bear the thought of rereading what you had written, and so I resorted to looking at your reviews.

It turns out that it was a transition. Never in the history of literature has any author implemented a time skip like you have. This is so very rushed, tacking the two years later onto the end of a sentence. You're not running a marathon, you're trying to present a vaguely readable story. Is that so hard to ask?

Even accepting that, what happened with Harry/Fleur? You give us no clue what happened between them. When they meet again, you give no flashback. You write mystery so that eventually things are resolved. I have no idea whether Harry pranked Fleur by telling her that he thought he had AIDS, or whether Bill interfered.

And the fourth chapter, you've done it again! The conflict is once again concluded in about... oh... 800 words. A single exchange of spells has taken more.

"Avada Kadavera" is so horribly mangled it's not even funny.

Voldemort and Ginny loving each other, quite frankly, is a freaking stupid concept. Your portrayal of Voldemort is like the standardized dumb villian taken to the extreme. He waited an hour for the spell paralyzing Harry to wear off for the sole purpose of dueling hiim.

With each keystroke, your keyboard groans in protest as you degrade these characters further into mulch unfit for the most debase lifeforms to lay eyes upon.

Know that a middle-aged balding man in New Jersey will never have cried blood until he heard this.

The END was a little weird? Only the end?

I usually review to tell authors how to improve their writing. But this story needs to be rewritten to a degree that you aren't capable of yet. Ditch it, practice writing (and reading) for a year or two, come back and read it again. Rewrite after the cringing has stopped. It might turn out to be something halfway decent, even.

Thw way it is, it'd take a miracle of existence to make a moderately intelligent person like this story. Thank you for wasting twenty of my minutes (three of them went shaking my head in disgust).

Your story is: 1. inconsistent, 2. filled with bad spelling, 3. in no way holds any interest (except maybe a desire to see how bad can it get). There is another longish review I see some ways down the page which does a good bit of criticism-- ignore the insults if you want and try to understand the rest.

To reiterate: ditch this fic. Plox.

... And it's VEELA. Not vella, velaa, or any other permutations thereof, you stupid **.

good so far please update I like it

nice fic i stil watting on the update

Pain, that's what I get reading this. A pain so bad, I need to leave ASAP or I may destory the computer. Fact is this shouldn't even be here for to much, I mean to little detail in your smut thing. This would be better gone. Lisen I don't care who you are but if this is the best you got stop trying now.

cool story i like it

wow this is the biggest pile of crap i have ever read? I'm confused as to wether you were writing a smut fic or were in fact writing crap.? please stop writing all together to save everyones IQ that is unfortunate as to stumble upon this fic.

This...was trash. No wonder we have it classified as "awesomely bad."

Please, at your convenience, drive a spoon through your eyesocket.

-LR

yay, Harry and Fleur is coming! As you can tell I love Harry and Fleur, their needs to be more of them. Looking forward to seeing more of this.