Dune is often said to be the sci fi version of fantasy Lord of the Rings. Both are masterworks, written by great writers, and have excellent main & minor characters.

Main difference: LOTR: 22 388 fics. Dune: 40. !

Even tiny LOTR characters like Grima or Ioreth (!) have their own fanfics, sometimes their own fanclub! Strangely, none cares to write about Dr Yueh, Piter de Vries or Hwi Noree. Why? Could it be because a Mary Sue would look kinda dumb in Dune universe (imagine the Sue flirting with a Guild agent because she can’t afford a space travel, or lost in the desert with Paul and Jessica… urgh)? Think about it! We need Dune fics! Fellow Dune lovers, do something!

Beautifully written! It reminds me of Frank Herbert's writing style. Have you read the series? I'm on Chapterhouse, but the first three books were my favorite

Not quite reaching up to Dune standards.

But VERY good compared to other fan fictions that were submitted.

Now for critique:

By the way, Paul did not delude himself that he had infinite vision (or could see EVERYTHING).

Kwisatz Haderach had his limits.

That was really good and I found from what I have read of the dune books very accurate. Have you noticed there are almost no dune stories. well I found your vocabulary a bit limited to what is in the books but ont inadiquate.

MORE! MORE! Please? That was excellent!

That was good, but Jessica and Chani were a little out of character. Chani would not call him Paul, she would call him Muad'Dib or Usul, and I don't think Jessica would use the word ails.

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Not bad for a supposedly rush job. Paul Muad'dib is one of the most tormented and tragic figures in literature, and you certainly captured that. Good job.

loved it, laine! one of ur best yet. i didn't know u were into dune too! write more!