Nice, heartfelt and sad description in the beginning. The "japor snippet" is too much taken from Anakin's I think; it confused me for a second. Unless that is a Tatooine tradition and I didn't know that. Make a more personal trinket? Describe the "play"? That's cool, how they point out planets. Aw, nice ending. Pretty good words throughout--continue!

Update soon I'm liking this =)

awesome

Hmm, pretty good. I'd think that Luke would reflect on his own feelings of his adopted or real parents' death at some point, and I don't like how you go to Brandyn's point of view to sortof escape what has been bothering Luke through the whole thing, how exactly he is going to tell Shana. Good words generally, and I like the ending lesson.

This is interesting, I would like to see how this turns out I like it.