Nice opening, and excellent voice. perhaps state that it's Kureno early in the chapter. Good descriptions and great characterization. You have some awkward phrasing in this fic, read through, simplify and compress. Good movement, and I like the strong diction. Aww, I feel bad for Akito but she is, kinda bringing it on herself.

Aww, this scene is adorable and I love how Kureno always puts Akito above himself. ^_^ yay they got up! 0.0 that is one creepy chant about the "ghostesses". This scene's simplicity is cute, I love it. Nice motivation, I keep wanting to make comments but they'd all be repetitive so far. Aww, it would be tormenting if Kureno were to go blind, such a sad thought T_T. Nice statement about Akito's fingers.

Although these paragraphs following the incident aren't very clear you have amazing ideas included, great work. Nice inclusion of the fairy-tale image. Wow, poor Yuki, are you talking about Akito getting hurt or Akito having a period?

I like the emotions you bring into the fic when you introduce the idea of Kana, I always forget that Kureno was around at that time. I mean I know it, just he isn't the person I normally think of. I like the conversation between Shigure and Akito I've never actually read a fic on this subject before. I like how it seems to loop around, great job with that.
Wonderful fic
~Myst

That was hauntingly beautiful. Kureno and Akito's complex relationship has always been one of my favorite parts of Furuba, and I think you described it perfectly. They're such a tragic pair... Akito was flawless, as well. I especially liked: "She’s never been anything but alone and all that keeps her going is that she believes the shadows on the walls are real." How true. Poor Akito.

Such a cute couple they are! X3 Update soon, please!

Akito is so...human.

I think that's what I adore most about this story; or at least what I love about your beginning. The whole desperation thing...and being scared...it's just kind of a shocker to see the side of her that isn't all calm and soothing and poisonous.

I, my dear, also adore it when you write from Kureno's point of view. There isn't enough with him, especially from inside his head, and I love it to itty bitty pieces.

"Gods cannot go where their worshippers do not."
I die of happiness, right there.

You have such perfect scene selection to show your point...and the dancing part makes me want to cry...it really does. Because it's so pretend and so sad and so real all at the same time...intentions upon lies; I adore it and you my dearest.

...and could you have picked more perfect things for her to be humming? No you could not have.

There's more I want to say...but the phrasing eludes me...but I will tell you that this fic made me shiver and want to cry and made me get minor cuddly feelings all through it, quite the emotional ride. I can't even begin to describe the overall feeling though...but it's amazing.

You're brilliant; that's all there is to it.

(And just for informing sake; as my e-mail is being horrible to me; I did send you a reply, and hope it got through. I do not want this to sound as if I am poking you for responses, just making sure it arrived. I shall wait patiently as you have done for me!)

Please write more soon...I live off of your writing...even if I do review late...

TTFN

Katia-chan

You know, your writing always convinces me that Furuba is so much deeper than what, with time, it starts seeming to be...

Can you dedicate a fic to someone when it isn't even in the same category as what you mentioned? I shall be hunting down parallels to Fatalistic to justify it.

Akito's desperation to escape the solitude.. ve'y nice.

Ah... the tragic "Don't do this AH NO YOU DID IT!" role. Poignant... poor Kureno.

And the theme of scars.

"She moves a hand restlessly, clutching the front of her robe as she so often does, and I realize she wants it out. Badly enough to claw it away, if she has to." ...? All I can come up with is ripping out heart or wanting to let out the gender secret.

All in all, ve'y wonderful! Nice that it reveals things about Kureno, and Akito... not just in the things he says about Akito, but in the way her actions portray her.

-Windswift

That was wonderful. You're a truly talented writer, and I enjoyed every moment I spent reading this. ^^

I know that pure praise isn't very helpful, but I don't like to offer criticism, and I really did think you did a spectacular job. Kureno really felt... like Kureno, if that makes sense-- at least how I see him.

So awesome job! I liked this alot.

I know it's a horrible thing to say, after things that I've written, but I don't really like KurenoxAkito. I mean, I love the concept of the whole obsessive-Akito thing, but... Kureno is more rational than that.

Still, each of us can paint a character for ourselves (our little rooster is vague enough for any interpretation) and you've shown a Kureno that would do all these things that you've shown. Oh, and I liked how you described him falling in the beginning.

Did he say She? like, a Kisa-style You? I thought I saw one. Oh well. Whedon-ness is awesome!

Alice, another masterpeice! I love it, Akito is just...wow...and you write her character so well. I love these little stories. And that Ghosteses thing I have one too "Moses supposes his toeses are roses but Moses supposes eroniously (sp?) i always think of it while I'm cooking...