o_o

. . . Right.

Okay. Well, how to edit this? As ever, this is rushed as hell. It would have been nice to see the fight between Tak and Mario play out, rather than having him be immediately knocked out.

Separate the dialogue into paragraphs by speaker, so each new speaker starts a new paragraph.

Pad your transitions with a sentence or two describing the characters, setting, and how the characters fit into that setting.

. . . . Huh.

Has the potential to be a really funny crossover. Zim+Mario=Insanity.

Um... its good but not your best.
keep going


(you spelt mele wrong, how could you)