O.O Oh. DEAR!

lol the end was funny

i hope naruto doesnt go and get yelled at and called demon by his own mother, because it sounds like she abandoned him

update soon!

Bravo and bravo again. I don't know as much about Naruto as I should to properly keep up with a fanfic, but I think I'm doing pretty good to follow.

So far so nicely done. Though I must beg of you, PLEASE don't do the kun-sama-kan-master-sensei-mama's boy-satan span thing. Well, I mean, you can if you want because all of the manga's do it. But I just don't like reading it because I watch more anime's than read manga's and they never say it in the shows. I guess that's just a pet peeve of mine, so nevermind it! lol I shall endure! :D

But anyways, the foaming-mouthed Hogake and the cat fight were nice. I'd say it was the properly placed amount of humor to lighten of the serious situations that were going on. Formatting is great! But to be nit-picky, you might want to re-read this once more again because you have a few missing words here or there. (Okay, I only counted one, but still, it bothered me. Fix it or I'll fix YOU!!) (Okay, the line sounded cool in my head but looking at it written down, it just sounds lame. Ignore the joke, moving on.) *lowers head in shame*

I must admit, the word count did scare me, mostly because I usually find myself reading when I don't have a ton of time (and I'm a slow reader lol) But even still, longer chapters will come and that's something a reader will have to get used to. But as far as the first chapter goes, I think readers wouldn't be so intimidated if the first chapter wasn't so long. (If you want to, you could break if off right after Hinata reached the Hokage and tells her the news, that way your first chapter can end of some great suspense [my middle name is cliff-hanger!] and the second chapter can start of a humorous note before ending in even MORE suspense! [i did enjoy the cliff-hanger])

But like I said, that's just a susgestion. I just say cut the chapter in half so you won't scare away oportune readers. But a long first chapter can show time, thought, and effor to those who are looking for a good read so that's up to you I suppose.

(Feel free to let me know when this review is getting too long. I'll shut-up whenever you want me to.)
Wendy: KEEP WRITING!!
Me: Yes ma'am. (Like my muse. She's great! From a story I've been working on for some years now called Farites.)
Wendy: Do you want me to hit you? WORK I SAID!!
*types rapidly while looking over shoulder with fear* ...please don't hit me...

Anyways, awesome job on the fight sequence. I can't think of anything that needs improving. In fact, it was down-right professional if you want the truth. I truely truely truely enjoyed it! You did a magnifient job.

Um, for my own personal reference because I know absolutely nothing, who is Tsunade? Has she been in the show before? No duh, of course she has! lol Well, if you give me a physical description of her I'm sure I'll figure out who she is. I'm just bad with names on the show. And am I suppose to know who Akatsuki is? Sounds like Akito from "Fruits Basket", but uh yeah, lol, am I missing some uber big part of the plot? Time to start watching that Saturday night cartoon more often! lol

But anyways, if there was anything I was going to say, my ADD is kicking in and I can't remember so as far as I can remember (syke, I'm playing. I remember everything lol :p) you're doing great! If there is anything at that you might want to do, it would be to put in a tiny-tiny-tiny bit (and I seriously do me an extremely small amount) of background info for the characters for us ignorants who want to read, but don't know the show as well as we should. You don't want to take up plot time boring the reader with a biography, but a good ole two or three sentences about some basic major things readers should know about the characters would be great. (And that doesn't mean make them run-on sentences. Remember, inform without wasting time!)

An author who's great at that is M.J MacHale, if you've ever read the Pendragon series. But that's all 'cause I'm probably killing the space for other reviewers! Later days Shadray and keep up the fantastic work!!

~RoseSama35~ I'm trying to find a new sig 'cause I can't remember my old one for the life of me. Feel free to make a suggestion lol

Haha, nice cliffhanger ending there. I liked how accurately you kept the characters in context, what with Jiraiya's pervertedness and Tsunade's emotionless yet empathic attitude.

Also,

(Please be at least remotely kind in your reviews, unless you are particularly interested in having an author track you down, burn down your house and destroy your crops. Oh, and if you request that I read one of your stories (in your review), I shall. n.n;)

Hmm, wonder how this applies if you've already read one of my stories. o_O Okay then! Read it again! >=) j/k, but I'm going to be getting back in the game soon enough so look out for updates. ^_~ Oh, not to mention, update this one cuz I wanna know more about the story and if it'll relate to how the manga's supposed to end. :P

Interesting start.