This was great! love the poetry!!

OH, PLEASE CONTINUE THS AWESOME FIC! IT WAS REALLY AWESOME!

That was really good. I liked the fact that it was angsty but still believable.

Very powerful. And amazing. Companion piece, yes?

How did I not see this before!

Lovely writing, great characterizations. I like the simplicity of the piece, how it captures so much with so few words. There are some fantastic lines in here, too. Also gripping is El's pitiless philanthropy, like compassion without emotion.

Great, great work. Love it!

Oh yes, it's me, your muse, your harshest critic, your should-be sister. And I must say Allie, I thought you were a pretty alright writer, but I was wrong..

You're phenominal.

I really loved this piece of work particularly, as it was in poem form. I really adore your writing, Allie, and you seem to get better with every piece you do. Don't ever doubt yourself.

Wow.

Yeah.

So very Sands.

If you do more, I'm looking forward to it.

I went through this like a wild hungry wind and I loved every tasty morsel of a chapter. It was GOOD! The whole thing was very impressive.

This was very good. I liked the "you lost" and then "fuck you."
that was funny. very sands-esque. :)

Ok... there needs to be MORE... ;) Short and sweet is fine, but MORE!! (you know, like what next...) Really well done. Thank you.

Honestly, I love it the way it is - not that I'd be upset to see more (lengthty chapters, full prose, etc.) but this is SO good the way it stands, I don't know if it *needs* more... you're the writer and you have to listen to your own set of Muses, but from here the piece is perfect as is... (although I hope to see more chapters, of course. I can't tell how how absolutely agonizing reading only a couple of hundred words at a time... but it's agonazing in a good sort of way...)

Cheers,
Helen

Okay-cool-this chap hooked me...It's well written, and intriguing--lots of places you could take this--hope you will!

like I say there is something likeable about this please keep going

I'm continuing to enjoy the poetry format - and I look forward to the next installments, regardless of whether it's prose or verse.

Helen

I agree -- there's something about this that I like even though I don't know what it is... I'm not normally into the poetry type thing, but there's something truly evocative about this piece so far. Looking forward to seeing what comes next!

Helen