You know, I've read a few of your Warren stories so far. They're great, and I really like them. But one thing just annoys the hell out of me: the fact that you use the same lines over and over and over again.

"A thought came unbidden to my mind, maybe all of this, the strange tempest in time, was meant to be. Of course when your father can see the future, fate loses its magic."

I've read that at least three times now. That, and the opening, gets pretty damn repetitive and dull. I suggest you try and come up with a little more originality in terms of beginnings and endings. It keeps things interesting and doesn't want to make the reader shoot himself.

Oh man. I have to say, I squealed like a little girl at the end of this installment. I guess this is just because it's the sequel so you've learned things and edited, but the writing in this, the character development and such, has massively improved from the first story.

I love how Lydia and Warren's relationship developed so naturally, not smoothly, but just with a certain story-like flow that didn't add or take away from the plot points. You're really good.

The only things I could possibly say would need work are just some sentence and idea clarity. Re-wording things so there are't mixed messages (unless intentional) and the reader won't get confused. All in all, great job, I can't wait to read the next part.

That was really good, I loved the ending with the neckalace. Are you going to continue in a different part?
Its so good.

Yay! brilliant story! I love your style of writing and this story in parts had me on the edge of my seat! Well done!

Nela

You're an amazing writer. :)

That was so sweet. I absolutely adored the ending. Great job.

I've really enjoyed it so far. Great job.

Oh so sweet... but not sickly, and I thank you for that. Interesting to watch the development of a realistic Warren/OC relationship, i.e. one that isn't of the near-intstantaneous variety- I'm enjoying this;)
I liked the backstory that described what happened to Lash and Speed and Penny, and the inclusion of Robert was a great concept.
Very, very nice:)
Erisah

oh...that´s so cute
i love it

AWW! So cute!

later!

Aw it's finished T_T
nice ending though :)

:)

O_O

:)

:)