...um. I'd fix the capitalization errors in the summary, then more people will be interested.

Good start, though I'd put more on Eragon's emotions and reactions. As well as a few details.

Please figure out how to get rid of the lines if you can, they make the text disjointed and hard to read.

Still, it's a good start!

Pretty good. But what's with the "The said again"? We all know what you mean, but just for verification, write it out. And what are the lines for? You could jsut use paragragh indentation and it'd be clearer to all of us. Thanks!

In chapter three you said that Eragon knew that dragons picked their riders, well to start off with he doesn't know very much about dragons and their riders at the very start of the book. He learns most of it from brom when he asks about them after finding Saphiras' egg right before the Ra'zak come looking for him and while Broms instructing him on the road.

Also you're leaving a lot of plot holes, not that it's very important this early on into the story, but it would help it out a lot if you could explain some more stuff in the chapters... Make the chapters longer! I can't stress that enough, while it is nice getting updates every few days, having longer chapters give people more to look forward to, because if you post one chapter every 4 days the size of the chapter is going to make a huge difference. people won't look forward to a small chapter that will take them about 1-3 minutes to read..

I'm only being tough because I know you can turn this story into something great..

L.U.D.

Well, not a horrible start if it's your first fic.. if it isn't, then I'm going to offer a bit of advice... It would be better if you took out those spacers (the lines like this _ )it would help it flow and be less distracting. You have a decent plot you should go with it, but try to use longer sentences and more detail. You give just the basic ammount of detail in the first chapter and it puts readers off. If you follow my advice then it will be more enjoyable...

Happy writing!

L.U.D.

good story update soon

i really like your story. i think that 1no, 2no. i just kinda want him to figure it out on his own. great story though.

i loved your story. i bet that it is going to be great. 1no, 2no. those were my votes.