"wow, I never thought of myself that good."

1. That sentence does not make sense.

2. You are not.

3. DO NOT REVIEW YOURSELF! Especially when telling yourself how good you are. Yes, I have reviewed one of my stories-ONCE-when I was getting a message out to readers that I would continue, because I had only been on the site for about 2 weeks.

Just no. NO.

Oh, Sonar, no one wishes this poem was true more than me...

and Raven...

and Zeta...

and Lilith...

and the ENTIRE F*CKING FANFIC COMMUNITY!

Sonar, dammit, you reviewed YOURSELF? Lemme tell you now, you are NOT "that good" you are the worst writer I've ever seen. I haven't met you, but suddenly, I really hate you.

I actually thought the line "I am so dead" was interesting in the poem. It's not used in writings like this often, unlike some of the clichéd terms suggested by other reviewers.

Well...that was what I call...interesting.

You're so good?

No way.

All I hear from you is death

Death becomes me

Death becomes her

Death becomes everyone

By the time you're done writing about death the world will fall around you.

You will never experience new life.

Good work on your death.

How about paying attenion to the living for a while? You might get more readers from it.

I hear enough about death in the world around me. Soldiers dying, war happening all around us. Do we really want to hear about everyone in this world crashing down into a pit of volcanic lava?

I want to hear about a first day of school or maybe something about a fish.

I want to hear ANYTHING but this whole death Jazz

How did you do that? What a sight!

You spelled YOUR OWN name wrong! Is that possible? Goodness sakes, and I thought roofing shingles were dumb!

Let me tell you something, you certianly picked your titles correctly. "Torture" Yup, this shocking example of human idiocy certianly was torture. Sums it up pret-ty well.

Do us all a favor. Stuff a cork up your cornhole and stop force-feeding us this excretement.

I laugh! Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!

Sonar, I have one word for you-THERAPY. From the way you write, I suspect that you need some serious professional help.

One last complaint: If this story is supposed to be about the character of Sonar, and it is entitled "Death Embraced Me", then I have but one question - why oh WHY did it let her GO? Why didn't it hold her till she expired? She's way past her use-by date, anyway!

You wrote a poem about yourself? My GOD, how vain can you get? Hell, I know PLENTY about torture, and you can't sum it up in one page.

What can I say?

"I am so dead"

Frat Girl? Surfer Sonar?

A better line would be "I am gone." "I have died." "I am dead."

But noooo. You had to say

"I am so dead"

Kinda makes a person think about...ego inflation?

Not only do you review yourself, you review yourself TWICE? And not only that, but you have the utter nerve to call your pre-teen level "angst" poetry 'good'. It isn't. And just one mistake in part two? Just one? Well, if you call the posting of this the mistake, then yes. Amongst everything else, part two contained one of the worst misuses of a "homage" to the episode "Sometimes You Hear The Bullet" that I've ever seen - in fact it approaches outright plagiarism. And as I've said before, the rest is just a very bad attempt at teen angst, and fails. I do try to say at least one nice thing about everything I review, so... well, it had an interesting title. Lot of potential. Unrealized potential yes, but potential nonetheless.

You've reviewed yourself? Little arrogant, yes?

One mistake in the second chapter.

wow, I never thought of myself that good.