Now you've got Vader in first person?! A quick post is not an excuse for this messiness. You know I like your work. Now decide on a point of view and keep it.

I like the scene where Anakin looks in the library. It feels realistic, helped by the dialogue.

Ugh, Palpatine. He uses everybody.

How Vader finds a potential Sith name for Padme and then kisses, her, that's pretty creepy. Eww. Anyway--I still wonder where the name Vader came from. Palpz just reached into the Force and got it, eh? Maybe there's a dead-world factory for Sith names. (lol, /offotopicness]

Is Luke going to come in to this?

You've made me like Padme more than anyone else. That's a good twist, that she goes to rescue her family before dealing with Vader (at the end of the chapter). I mean, it makes sense, but it's off the galactic scale, more realistic than most Star Wars plots. Nice.

I Like Please Keep Writing

Whoah, Force transportation? I guess that makes sense as she's only a spirit. Very cool description with "Sinking within the waterfall, soon Padme Naberrie Amidala Skywalker became simply a ripple in an endless current, ringing around the universe itself; truly one with the Force." (although the use of her absolutely full name is a bit jarring).

"traces from before Vader." is cool. Though I was not sure how to articulate what I liked about it,(perhaps that Anakin sees himself and Vader as different people?) it lingered untill I had to comment.

"...Palpatine had place(d) in his head."

Good, intense fight scene.

You lapse into first person again. Do try not too; it raises far too many questions about the author's motivations and tecnique.

Ah, memory altering. Interesting. Very good chapter besides the first-person bit, which presumably forgot to be edited.

" in situations like this. He sat down " would be best served by a comma instead of that period.

Vader's transformation is poignant and, while not entirely plausible, fun.

I just decided to read this story from start to latest update, and it's beautifully written. :D I love it! Please update soon!
- toocissy4yew

When are you going to update?

Good.

Good.

Good.

Good.

"right before I started to train with Revan"

Awsome Padme a jedi awsome! Loved that Leia recognized her btu what about Luke when will she meet luke? Sorry about the typing but i loved it. Please write more.

Claire

Where you use single dashes ("go talk with Leia-she does not know" etc.) using two dashes would be easier to read, visually.

"she will be sage [safe] here"

Ooh, looks like in this OT everyone except Luke is going to have a grasp of the Force. Poor fellow. Anyway, interesting chapter. Of course Palpz would show up, what with all this precognition, but that's really gonna change canon...

Good.

"It was a mean thing to do to one’s husband, Padme supposed, but when they’re on the Dark Side and practically killed you once, what’s a little mental agony?" lol

Leia and Padme interact smoothly. Both are fierce and cunning...and coming into a part of themselves that we never saw in the movies. It is hard to judge their characterization now.

"We have just complet[ed] all scans"

Interesting chapter. I'm not entirely sure why Vader assumes Padme is on Naboo, though.