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| emma134 2007-05-23 ch 5,  | abusethat was great |
| silverfox-175 2006-09-02 ch 5, | abusePlease you must write more I can't wait to read more, so update as soon as you can. |
| 123-.-HighOnLife-.-321 2006-07-24 ch 5, | abuseoh, fiddle sticks! hahaha this is really good, please com back to this! PLEASE! |
| 123-.-HighOnLife-.-321 2006-07-24 ch 3, | abuseoh, that's so sweet! |
| 123-.-HighOnLife-.-321 2006-07-24 ch 1, | abuse"Logan pulled up to the mansion that he’d left nearly a year ago, leaving behind a promise to a ‘kid’, who unknowingly owned his heart as well (and his dog tags). " Love that line! Great story plot. |
| RoXy-BiG-mOuTh 2006-06-02 ch 5, | abuseReally great - is it complete? (I didnt see if it was or not!) |
| hollowsoulwithabrokenheart 2006-04-15 ch 5, anon. | abuseuh it was interesting though why was there so much space in the first two chapters just curious? oh and it is a good story |
| baby12 2005-07-03 ch 5, | abuseloved it |
| Pig Sticker 2004-12-18 ch 5, | abusecontinue writing soon! |
| Goldenkeys 2004-11-14 ch 5, | abuseI know it's been like two years since you stopped writing this story, but please please please start it up again! You rock, and your story is so good. |
| wolf 2004-10-14 ch 1, anon. | abusei love your work it is a great story keep up the great work |
| please keep writing thanks 2004-04-15 ch 5, anon. | abusei really like your stories please start the next chapter soon thanks |
| Angels-Childe 2004-01-28 ch 2, | abuseI'm only on part two, but I cant wait for your to finish the story! |
| Schrander 2003-09-03 ch 3, anon. | abuseA few things: "taut" means pulled tightly. "Taunt" is to make fun of someone. Similar words, but with very different meanings -- you'll want to watch that. Tense: the time that an action takes place. Most of your story is in the past tense,i.e. "Logan looked at her and raised an eyebrow..." but sometimes you lapse and stick in a present tense verb: "She kisses him..." You'll want to try and keep everything in the same tense. Accent: It is very difficult to write someone's regional accent. You would be better off just giving a hint of Rogue's Mississippi accent every now and then, instead of trying to write her every line with her accent. This makes it very hard to read (Ever try to understand Joseph in _Wuthering Heights_?) and distracts from the story. All that said, I have been enjoying this story very much so far, and can't wait to finish it. You have a good handle on plot and pacing, and your characterizations are pretty close to the mark as well. Thanks for sharing. |
| Grey8 2003-08-06 ch 6, | abuseSorry to hear your life has gone to hell, I know the feeling. Hope you come back from it ok and that it doesnt take too long for you. You have a great story going here, so I hope this is one you decide to continue when your ready. Take care and keep smiling |