I love the story and u should really update soon and change the thing on the story so it doesn't say complete, that just throws off readers and not too many people like one shots.
If u really want more people to review u HAVE TO UPDATE, believe me hardly anyone gets a lot of reviews on the first chapter and alot of times those reviews r harsh, so don't give up. The quicker and more u update the more reviewers u'll have so please don't discontinue this story. It relally is a good idea.

well it's vry confusing and doesn't rlly make sense,mayb u should make it longer and doesn't rush so much...u should also space more often,other than that it's prty good.hope u update soon!!