It's really stupid that I've never reviewed it, because it's one of those stories I read way back when, and it's stayed with me for a long, long time, and I've re-read it a bunch, including just now. It's so painful, and melancholy, not a word out of place. I love it so much.

Ooh, I love this story and I love your writing.

I especially love how you use time as a motif to show Dean's progression.

Thank you for sharing.

~Kat

Oh wow, that was sad. He needs a big ole hug... from Sam. Made me feel very very despondent. I have to keep reminding myself that they are back together now :) Great job capturing the emotion!

This is a great story, very well written and just the perfect tone.

OMG ... that was so beautiful and touching and heart wrenching! I love the way you write the boys, it feels so real and just how I'd imagine Dean to think and exactly how life must have been after Sammy left. I love how he counts the days and then finally starts forgetting. Absolutely Brilliant!
Kind regards
Merisha ;0)

OMG, the final cell call to Sammy for Christmas really did it to me. *sniff*
How could they drift that far apart? And Dean and John never even talk anymore - heart-breaking story and well-written.

Glad though, Dean's knee's going to be ok again eventually. Loved the parking lot job! Hehe

Dude. You make me so sad for Dean.

This is really insightful and really elegantly written.

I usually like the 'happy ending'. But yours - happy or moody - are better, not contrived. You really write to the characters and this story seems so realistic. My favorite line: Dean stares at his puzzle, sees Sam’s long agile fingers gripping a pen too tight, and Dean thinks, Did ‘em in pen because you could, because you never had to erase anything. Need a ** big eraser for this do-over, Sammy. Big old college-sized eraser. Rub it all out, make it not have happened. They sell erasers that big at Stanford?
Excellent!

This was just so sad. People relate to Dean even when he doesn't want them to, he can't see what other people see when they interact with him. I enjoyed this story it was really great. I wish Sam could understand just how wounded Dean was by him leaving. Did Sam even think about the fact that he was leaving him with someone that had been emotionally crippled for almost twenty years and that Dean would be affected by that. Sam was really Dean's only link to the outside world and emotional contact. Sorry went off on a tangent. Anyway again it was an excellent stroy.

My favorite part is the telephone conversation. Very good. What a sad life - Dean without Sam.

You made a great job of putting across Dean's sense of loneliness and isolation in this story - surrounded by people, but not really one of them, so totally alone. And the comment about his never having been a 'nice boy' and the nice boy having left him? Well that had me bawling... But any emotional Dean torture seems to do that to me just lately...!

My big sis is a big fan of yours and she read this on your lj and recc'd it to me. I thought the 'Bo' thing was really sweet. Dean's awesome. It made me tear up, how he coped as if the world wasn't there anymore and he was living as if he didn't even know it. I dunno how to explain, hope that made sense. But loved it, anyway, the ending was heart-warming as the rest of the story was heartbreaking. One of my favourites

Jay

Wow, this was amazing. I really love so many things about this fic, but I don't have time to list them all, but let me just say that your characterizations were great. GREAT.

What a cool one-shot. Very sad, I don't think I ever feel worse for Dean then when I read stories that happen in the time right after Sam left. You can tell it probably took him a while to get his groove back after Sam left for college from the show, and so many writers have noticed that and written about it. Every time I read a story about it though, it feels like I've never read about it before. I think that's because everyone feels isolation at some point in their lives. So the emotions really ring true when people write about Dean's loneliness.

I love how you did John's mood changes. I wonder how much the fluctuation was due to the hunts?

I loved that it was just 'Bo', and Dean used to add things on to it. Sounds like a larger analogy to Sam and Dean all around. It was very bittersweet, I even teared up a little.

Excellent one-shot. Thanks for sharing.

Oh GOD! This was heart-breaking.

CHRIST!

I just feel so BAD for Dean. When he says out loud, "I had a brother," well, it just about tore me to pieces. Seriously, I have tears in my eyes right now (maybe that has to do with the combined facts that I'm alone tonight, and I just got off the phone with my baby sister, and I really can't imagine her just taking off, but...well, see what a good fic and too much imagination will bring ya?). And him asking Sam if he needs any money...It's just such a classic parent thing to ask, and that along with his absolute NEED to remember what the bear's name was shows just how much Dean lost when Sam walked out the door. He's lost more than his brother...he's lost his child (which is horrible, but true) and his way.

I loved this, but I have to end this raving (literally) review now, because I need to go blow my nose. I'm sure you understand.

Thanks for sharing--

Emrys