an oldie but a goodie

I think that's single-handedly the best TT fic I've ever read. No joke. Maybe you think I'm just being eccentric, but I've never read such a realistic, eloquent, and interesting piece before- and I've read a lot of fanfiction *guilty gulp* You're a very talented writer. Great work!

Hm... well first off, this was a little hard to grasp the full meaning because of a few editing mistakes. Nothing too big, just little annoying stuff. Also, it was hard to tell what was THEN and what was NOW.

This is some very good writing, though it is quite obvious you did not edit. A few things weren't phrased correctly, something tthat would have pushed the story to be better, and would be obvious if you reread your work.

I suggest editing once more, because it really shows that extra step that makes stories all the better.

Still, great writing. Loved the idea.

-Em

This was really cool so far. Great fight scene.