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| XeroGundam 2007-01-30 ch 1,  | abuseInteresting...most of them were cool but the second one was a tad confusing. 8/10 a nice haiku is cool break from the everyday story. Plus I totally agree Asuka = Devil but did you know that the Devil = Barney? |
| SpikeyKun 2007-01-28 ch 1, | abuseAren't haiku's normally in a 5/7/5 syllable format? Hm... I think focusing your poetry into something a bit more concrete would be a bit more interesting... perhaps haikus based around your other fanfiction to illuminate or further emphasize the feelings and development of the characters past what's known and felt in canon? I find poetry that's based around such general characteristics to be lacking... Either take a stance that can be contended or interpreted in different ways, or try to channel something a little less apparent... perhaps even tie in multiple haikus to flow into one another so you can build a more complex poem structure. A small example: cicadas chirping, MAN'S everlasting summer a prelude to FALL. Something I've noticed in the anime is that the chirping of cicadas are very apparent whenever the screen pans to the outdoors. Cicadas usually seem to herald the end of summer, but as we know of the evaverse, the weather is the same all year round do to second impact. It's a situation where time has stopped, but at the same time, anticipating change of some sort... The Fall of Man, as I clumsily try to play on words above... Fall follows Summer, but also has a more fatalistic meaning which can be an interpretation of how Eva progresses... Meh, clumsy, but I prefer poetry that tries to go above and beyond just the forms, and has more to do with insight and interpretations... Hope this is of help! |