   Serotonin Storm
2007-09-17 . chapter 4I just read everything you've posted on here, and I'm much too lazy to comment on them separately, so I'm going to do it all here. I have a few thousand things to say, so bear with me.
Bargaining was just painful to read. And I mean the content, you know, not your writing. I hate seeing people that way, so...pathetic that they have to resort to trying to extort people to get what they want. And the really sad thing about it is that now, even if he wants Wilson really, Wilson's just going to think he's after something again. So the genuis screwed himself over. And I have to say, although I loved it, I'm glad that not everything you write is quite so depressing, because you do depressing very, very well.
I will seriously worship you if you continue Hidden Occurrences in a Microscope. I know it's been a really long time since you started it, but I absolutely love the tie-ins of the dreams, and I really want to know what he does about the entire situation. Plus, I kind of like the Tritter fics, though he was a painfully annoying presence on the show. Always getting in the way of our dear insane little doctor. Right, like I said, I know it's been a while, but you just have to continue it.
Suspended Bridge was very...poetic, in a way. It was almost plot-less, but beautiful written, and sad without being sappy, something that House is most definitely not. I can't stand it when people have fucking sappy Houses. It's just not...right. It doesn't fit. And I think the way that House reacts in this piece is very appropriate, because it isn't that he doesn't have feelings (another annoying thing that fic writers tend to do, when they're not getting sappy), but he prefers to hide them. I think it was fitting that he actually got upset and yelled more than he meant to, as if he regulates his feelings normally, and it just got out of hand. I also like how this fic isn't depressing, really, but it isn't happy. It's realistic, because I don't care what all the shiny-happy-loving people say, if you're being careful and thinking ahead, you rarely go for what you want. There's too much to lose.
I liked God's Hands, though I'm not really a Chase/ House fan. I thought that it felt unfinished. And it was cute and seemed realistic, though truthfully I don't really think I can even pretend to understand the way Chase thinks as well as I understand the way House thinks, or even Wilson. But, right, like I said, it didn't feel finished. It felt like something should actually happen, and nothing really did. I know it was meant to be short, but it came off feeling a bit plot-less. Not to say that I didn't like it, though, because I did. Or I would have read it, obviously.
Two Million To One was just...adorable. It was sweet and funny, and although you could see the Wilson twist coming after we find out that House has mono, that didn't make the payoff any less satisfying. Very cute.
I thought The Easy Joke was sweet and very funny. You must have been going through a happy period, there's not very much angst in those couple of pieces, which I can appreciate. Too much angst gets annoying. And you're right, Robert Sean Leonard has gained weight. But I think it sets well on him. Some people can pull that off. I always thought he had a great body, though, all the way back to Dead Poets Society. He's very lanky.
Kälte... My god, please tell me you're going to write some more Swing Kids slash. I loved Swing Kids, I own it, and it was definitely homoerotic, I don't care what anyone says. And since I already know you're a sure bet, would you please write more? Please? I love your stories, please continue them.
Phone Tag... Obviously, this one was brilliant. Your stats make that glaringly obvious and me, glaringly jealous. It was long-ish without being plot-less, rambling, or boring. And I have to say right now, for all your fics, that your House and Wilson and Cuddy are all so in character that it makes me sick. Anyway, story. I thought it was great. I usually don't go for fics where they're already together, you know, because it takes some of the fun out of it. But this one was good. I like how it started out as just sex and gradually progressed to something that actually meant something, something that would make House get jealous but actually try, in his own way, to hang on to Wilson. I also loved how you had one of Wilson's wives in there without having her be an annoying entity only there to screw up House's and Wilson's relationship. That was very refreshing. And the ending was very satisfying, because they actually got each other, even though House obviously wasn't one-hundred-percent better.
His Favorite Thing. Once again, not exactly big on Chase and House, but it was well-written. Sort of sentimental for House, but everyone's sentimental inside their own head. Anyway, short and sweet, and very nice.
Knight Takes Knight I was totally into. It was a very House thing to do. There are something people that are just adjectives, like House and my friend Brent, and this was definitely appropriate and fitting to House's adjective. The come-fuck-me jeans thing was hilarious. A very funny and very in-character (besides the making out, there's not much homoerotic kissing) oneshot.
I liked Only A Test, though I don't really have very much to say about it. It didn't really go anywhere and definitely feels unfinished. I like his uncertainty in the beginning because, honestly people, there have got to be things that House isn't confident about. He's not God. I'm sure he'd be perfectly aware that he wasn't all-powerful, were he real. He's not delusional. Right, so, liked it, but didn't love it. Loved the beginning, though.
Okay Pressure Valve was awesome. Pure and simple. Just awesome. I mean, come on, we all know Wilson's weird, we just don't get know quite how weird. We get the feeling, but don't really understand. I loved House in this one. He was testing and pushing, which is what he fucking does. And he got his way, like he always does. It was so well put-together and everything tied up very nicely, like usual. Great job, and very original.
I was so glad that Wilson didn't actually cheat on him in All Relationships Take. That would have been terrible, especially if he pretended that nothing had happened. I really liked the fact that we never actually get to know what's wrong with House, if anything, only that Wilson realizes that he's being a moron and it's not that big of a deal. Like I said, I'm more into the first-time fics than the established relationships, but this was really fun to read. Beautifully set up in the end, too, nice way to make everyone panic.
Voices Carry was cute, but I kind of agree that with the House doesn't make noise during sex point of view. With people who don't like feeling vulnerable and don't like emotional connections, they're going to be guarded during sex. It's very hard for me to picture House being completely open and out-of-control, or very vocal, to be honest, because that's like giving some part of yourself up, and also telling your partner that they're doing a good job, and House doesn't do gratification much. I don't know, it's kind of hard to explain, but it makes sense in my head. It's just my opinion, anyhow. I don't write sex anyway.
Voices Carry was very cute. Witty dialogue, though I'm not completely sure that I got it. It sounds very House-like, though, possibly I'm just missing something. And why in the hell is Chase balancing House's checkbook?
Ah, I liked Cosmo Boy. House would do something like that, tell someone that they have a chance on paper, though verbally he wouldn't feel comfortable. I'm not quite sure what they're doing, but I love the magazine bit and I thought the ending was very, very sweet. You're kind of making me like House/ Chase fics, which I resent, because I find the pairing creepy.
And Rock and Roll was one of my favorites. House understood Wilson, even when Wilson didn't really understand himself, which is how they work, and vice versa, because, for some unknown reason, Wilson just gets House. And that was really apparent when he understood why House told the hooker that his name was Jimmy. That was just classic. I loved the 'You have to come out sometime' line. (And by the way, if I got that line wrong, I'm not writing these comments as I read the stories. I already read the stories and I'm commenting all at once. So give me a break.) I love first-time fics, so I really liked this one of yours.
Like This--Chase/ Wilson? Oh god, my eyes burn... Though it was cute, you know, pointless porn...But really, come one? That's...My god. At least, in the end, Wilson really wanted to be with House. Which, by the way, was a great little twist there, with the lying and switching of the sex positions and such. It was sort of sad, but I loved it. Wilson is always sort of sad, for some reason.
The Book Meme really confused me. I loved the parts of it that I actually got, but some of it just went way past me. Like the ocean one and the flu in September one. You had a great writing style, like always, but it was too vague and didn't have enough of a plot for my tastes.
Speech I didn't think I was going to like, but I ended up loving. I'm not too crazy about the idea of House and Wilson having a kid, but I liked how this turned out. The 'daddy' thing was just simply brilliant. That would have broken Wilson's heart, and House would have fixed it silently, so that was just perfect. It was also perfect how the lisp ended up tying into the later chapter when he was a teenager and doing his spoilt teenage thing. House was a little...protective, but then again, he lived with the kid for a number of years. Maybe he grew on him. Maybe he just wanted to be the good guy for once. Who knows? Regardless, great work.
I had Piano Man read to me by an ex-girlfriend a long time ago, but I remember I couldn't get enough of it. It was for sure one of the favorite things that she read to me, and she read me a lot of fucking stories. I mean, as House and Wilson, there wasn't much of a tie-in to the actual characters, but as your own characters, my god is this good. I didn't actually read it tonight, but I remember enough to know that this is one of your best pieces. And it was a really original, albeit probably unlikely, take on their meeting. One of the best young House and Wilson fic that I've read, no doubt about that.
Another Fine Mess I liked because of the House and Wilson mini-plot there, but I'm so not a fan of any sort of House/ Cameron or Wilson/ Cameron. Probably because I'm not a fan of Cameron. Character or actress. I'm glad she's leaving, I'm hoping she drops off the face of the show, which is starting tomorrow, I'm glad to say. So I liked it, but it's not one of my personal favorites.
New Connection is a great sequel and you have to, have to, have to continue it. House's jealousy is so...perfect, really. Not clingy jealous, paranoid jealousy. And it's so appropriate how he stabs Wilson with the guilt every now and then. And really, I know that the whole thing was back in the other story, but that was a fucking stupid thing for him to do. What good did he think was going to come of it? Selfish moron. Anyway, I just have to know what Wilson wants to look and what's going on with Katie if House doesn't think she's pregnant. Please continue this soon.
So let's it for my uber-review. I just have a few more comments. First off, watch out for a few mistakes you tend to make, like saying 'to' when it's really 'too', or 'then' when it should be 'than', which are common mistakes and you said something about a Beta. I'd just recommend going back and proofreading some of your old things, because you've improved with things like that since you started posted, and you'd probably catch a few mistakes. Secondly, I adore you and your writing style, and if you don't write more, I'm going to find you, tie you up, and starve you until you give. I will. Not kidding. So write. |
FanFiction.Net - unleash your imagination
