Wait what happened to Les? Was he killed? Is he still alive? Will we find out in a sequal? Squee, I hope so... please sequal this!

If this were a movie, I’d be cheering and clapping right now. This was a fantastic ending to a fantastic story.

You took a big chance changing from your usual style but it paid off. The style seemed totally natural. Not many writers could have pulled that off.

That attack on Mush and his memory of his parent’s death had me on the edge of my seat.

I loved the sharp contrast between the beautiful family scene and the brutal murders that quickly followed.

Again your descriptions were superb. I could actually see that beautiful little boy being chased down by his parent’s murderer. Your depiction of Mush’s mother protecting him with her body and comforting him with her last breath was exceptionally moving.

I really thought that Mush had bought the farm. I almost jumped up and shouted when he opened his eyes.

Things I particularly liked about this story:

You allowed Spot to be human. He was not the tougher than life character we usually see. He showed fear, he vomited, and he cried. He is so much more interesting as a human than a sociopath.

The relationship you built between David and Jack was wonderful. Despite their tense surroundings, the progression wasn’t rushed. Their bonding was easy and natural.

You really kept me wondering throughout the story. At one point I thought that either Spot was the murderer or he had an evil twin who used Spot’s given name.

Mush was an outstanding character. You allowed him to keep his innocence despite the horrors he’d experienced both as a child and after the return of his attacker.

I can’t, however, figure out if Blink really thinks of Mush as his brother or as something more. In my mind there was enough there where Blink could eventually cross that emotional line.

And Yay! You’ve decided to bring Gypsy back. He is one of the best original characters I’ve ever read.

Outstanding Work!

I loved this story!!
Great job with it!
and Im glad that they saved Mush and killed the guy!
This story was really good, im gonna put it on my favs! (if its not already lol):)

NO! No fair, no fair I say! You can't be done!?! I want more! Stupid stories always having to end... Twas a great story, and I applaud you fully. Is it sort of bad that I actually do like it that Les didn't come back? I love how this ended bittersweetly; too many stories end happily, and I'm sick of it. God. That was good. I need to get my act together and finish up mine. As if.

That was so win.
You get a waffle with gravy on top!!
^o^

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
--Queen of the Gnomes,
NumbuhZero

AMAZING, amazing fanfic! argh, one of my new favs!! The Javid at the end was excellent - the whole thing was just so well written. Too bad they never found Les though. Thanks for making me the ravid Javid shipper I now am, haha.
:)

ah! noo! poor Mush!! he can't die!! aww he is soo adorable and so innocent and so just he cant!!
I must know whats going to happen next!!
this was a really great chapter!
Liked how you had Spot not really having gone to see that guy and how you had him dead! Nice twist!
Can't wait for more! :)

aw no poor Les! I hope he isn't gonna nbe dead, and maybe he wont cause David didn't have any dreams! That would be good!
and some nice Jack/David stuff going on there! lol who doesn't love them together!!
Ha Spot!! I love him!! Love how he goes walkign into the office like he owns the place and is so pissed and threatens him! lol Great job with him!!
Love this story!! def gonna go on my favs!! :)

The plot thickens and the mystery deepens.

Dutchy’s body was left in a different condition than the others. . . . Interesting.

Mush, David, and Gypsy seem to have a spiritual connection. Their dreams and visions seem to be intertwined. I’m wondering if Jack’s dreams aren’t connected as well.

I got a chill when I read; “You’re in danger, lamb. He’s not just gonna kill you. He wants you first.”

Gypsy is an outstanding character. If he survives GHtO, I’d love to see you include him in other stories.

Again, I like how you used David’s memories of Jack’s hands to tell a story without need of detailed descriptions.

I really liked the exchange between David and Jack at the distribution center. Despite the fact that they were discussing the uncomfortable topic of their coupling, you broke the tension and brought both of their basic character traits back into focus. David was direct to the point, and Jack’s sense of humor shown through.

“Davey…do you have any regrets about last night?” before he could answer, Jack continued. “’Cause I don’t. I’m glad it happened. Do you know how long I wanted to do that?”

“Jack…this…isn’t the right time,” he said diplomatically. “But if you must know, no. And you need to go see Spot.”

He let out a sigh. “How are we gonna do this?”

“Do this? You mean…it? Again?” David felt his face heat up.

“No,” Jack laughed. “You offerin’? I mean, with the murders. There’re some boys missin’, includin’ Les. What’re we gonna do about that?”

I didn’t expect Ashby to be the next to go. In the words of Spot Conlon; “I guess he ain’t our killer.”

Blink had definitely grown protective of Mush. I wonder if it’s close friendship or something more.

I received another chill when I read:

Before Blink could answer, a cry rented the air. It wasn’t a cry for help but more like a yelp of pain that dogs made when it was kicked in the side. He remembered his words about Mush and how he reminded him of a puppy.

Damn, I hope Mushy’s okay.

I love this story more with each new chapter.

Skittery’s affection for the children, especially Tumbler, brings gentleness to this incredibly intense mystery. It’s reminiscent of my favorite background feature of the movie.

Somehow you managed to bring three wonderful stories together to make one glorious mystery. The Jack/David story, the Mush story, and the murders could easily stand alone as good solid stories. Bringing them together is genius.

The Jack/David portion of this chapter was exceptionally well written.

“Layers seemed to peel away like the petals of a flower and there was nothing between them now. Jack put his lips on his, sealing them with a warm touch. He kissed him passionately and thoroughly, more so than he had ever kissed anyone. He got lost in his riot of chestnut curls, drowning in the blue puddles of his eyes. Jack kissed a trail of kisses down his throat. Everything was so hot. It was as though they were scorching each other with each touch and kiss.”

Jack’s flashback to the previous night on the fire escape and the love scene were earthy and visceral. You gave us raw passion without the crudeness that so often blankets these scenes.

I certainly didn’t expect Less to go missing. The fact that David gave in to his feelings for Jack the same day made David’s guilt more emotional.

I found David’s musings about Jacks hands particularly poignant.

The Ashby and Thomas Conlon scene was very interesting. It was a definite eyebrow raiser.

Sorry about the long review, but there was so much going on in this chapter that I couldn’t help myself.

And you get extra points for using the word “juxtaposed.”

I’m so glad that Mush is alive. I was afraid that the murderer had gotten him.

I adore a good mystery and this is a great one. I’m completely baffled.

I kept reading this on over and over. I’m wondering if Mush really fell or did something else happened to him?

The lullaby voice has me stumped as well.

I’m utterly hooked on this story.

Fabulous work!

No!
He's too sexy to kill!!
T-T
You monster.

UPDATE!!

XOXOXOXOXOXOXOXO
--Queen of the Gnomes,
NumbuhZero

^ 0 ^
You are my hero!!

**Luvles**

XOXOXOXOXOXOXO
--Queen of the Gnomes,
NumbuhZero

...

Ok, so I have this thing about children being murdered, even ficticiously. I really hope Les is simply missing, but still alive. I really, really hope so.

Despite worrying about Les, I thought the Javidness was hot. Does this make me a bad person?

Ashby isn't the killer. Maybe Gypsy, but I really hope not (because then my love for him will lessen. But only a bit).

Oh, a mystery(ish thing). I haven't seen any of /those/ in awhile.
Or ever.
Poor Jakey :( Gosh, Snodds, why'd you have to go and /die/ on the kid like that, huh? Geeze. Kids these days don't think of nobody but themselves, I'm tellin' ya...

Jester. Wart. Wildcat. Valentine. Pickle. Gypsy. Lion. Star. And of /course/ Ashby. Oh such lovely, lovely OCs...-lickes- They could practically be canon, they're so well written...

Update soon. This fic is good for my health. -nodnod-

lessthan3
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