This...confuses me. You mess up very simple grammar, but you have an amazing vocabulary. It's like you know english as a second language and studied a dictionary or something. It's very bizarre, and really ruins the flow of a story. Its such a jarring change that it almost makes you wince as you read it. It flows smoothly with a variety of big words and complicated metaphors, then hits a giant pothole when you use the incorrect tense form.

As for the story itself, there is a few minor things that bothered me. For one, the story suggests that this is a woman's journal, so unless she's a linguistic scholar, I don't think she'd be using such extravagant language. Also, she turns it into a history lesson at one point, which is a bit bizarre.

At one point she says she's wearing heels, yet she is perfectly capable of breaking out into an all out run? Not that I've ever worn heels before, but that sounds like a skill most don't acquire.

I like the concept of the story, but it could definitely use some work. If you don't speak english natively, it'll definitely help you to consult a native speaker about your story so that they can help you with word usage and tenses and the like. If you are a native speaker, then I am not only incredibly confused, but I think your english teachers should be fired.

Wow, You are so going to have to send your stuff to a native English speaker for beta-reading or you will never get rid of the grammar and spelling correcters Rayne. I like this little experiment. This was an excellent set up for numerous vignettes from the varied citizens of Nerima. Was a little surprised by the denial of identity at the end. Ranma usually tells his name even when he shouldn't.

Looking forward to more.

Write something everyday.

-JW

So was that Ranma? looks like it could be good. MORE MORE MORE.

...Gee, I was lost early on in this story. Try fixing your spelling mistakes, I think that's what derailed me.

Interesting way of telling the story. I like it. I want more.

"He asked me if I was alright to which I shyly nodded affirmative. He then offered to walk me home and wouldn’t let the subject drop until I assured him that I would be able to make it home by myself. He bid her farewell and warned her not to be out alone so late."

Switch from 1rst to third person for a sec, but other than that, pretty good. It's an interesting approach to a Ranma fanfic. Looking forward to the next chapter.

Dude first its not i was about to be rape its
i was about to be raped it's really bad if i have to correct your grammer and spelling as my own is quite poor but even I could tell this was poorly writen read it fix it post it again

as for the story it self ... pretty nice

hm, very interesting. I hope you update soon. I wonder where you'll take the plot.