Oh snap... This is freaking awesome! Nice work. I hope you eventually are struck with the inspiration to write a sequel to this. Keep at it.

Oh man. You just turned me from a "Jet is okay I guess" fangirl to "Ahmahgawd Jet is teh smex" fangirl.

“I can’t believe I’m wearing this,” Jet commented with mild disgust. “I’ll have to bathe at least ten times under the world’s largest waterfall when this is over.” He glanced over at Zuko. “No offense.” Then he thought for a moment. “Actually, I take that back. I did mean to offend a little,” he amended with a slight grin.

THAT LINE.
THAT LINE.
You are awesomesauce.
:D

Hello Author
i have read your fic and i have to say
it was pretty good
and i would have liked to have seen a sequel
but seeing you have another fic
i won't pester
but still you ended it kinda...
in a spot that i wish there was a sequel
-sigh-
oh well
i shall read your other fics latter Author
see ya

Anything you might want to say about how this would continue ;) ;) But this was a great and different story.

Sokka's bouquets of ham made me laugh out loud. Pure comic genius. :)

He! Really great story and a really great read! I enjoyed this so much; it was just made of so many fantastic little moments!

Out of five:
Plot - 4
Characterization (keeping em in character) - 3.5 (4 if not for Jet)
Interaction - 4
Originality - 3.5
Pacing - 5
Writing Style - 4
Beginning - 2
Ending - 5

Overall - 4/5

The start was a bit too corny (Zuko sits behind a door and hears he's been betrayed... so he waits for her to come to him and THEN makes an angry outburst and gets away? Bleh). However, your pacing was perfect, and that, along with style, is something that is hard to learn. Plot and character skills can be developed, but pacing and style is usually natural. You have tons of potential as a writer.

I give you HUGE props for your ending. Deciding to end it "early" was by far the proper choice. You didn't let it drag any longer than you wanted it to be, either because of fan pressure or self pressure.

Some particular things I've liked that I haven't seen before, (but have always wanted to see) - Fire Nation rebellion dedicated to Zuko. Never seen a fic with this concept before, but I've been looking for one. Ending it before the "final episode" was also something I haven't seen before in this kind of fic, so good job on that.

My thoughts on your characterization -

Aang - A little to excepting of Zuko/Katara, and a bit too mature SOUNDING at times, but overall, well done.

Katara - No problems here. You wrote her no differently than anyone else ever does.

Toph - Your best characterization, in my opinion. You really nailed her playful/teasing nature. Great job.

Jet - And here is my problem. He changed too quickly for my liking, and though it helped with the pacing, it left me with a bad taste in my mouth.

Mai - Good stuff. No problems.

Zuko - Not the most original characterization, but for what it was you did it well. It's not the best I've ever seen, but you did it above average. He got more believable (in his actions, words, and thoughts) as the story goes on, and I can tell you matured as a writer throughout that time period.

So, overall you did a pretty good job. I commend you for actually FINISHING a fic, a great accomplishment even if it hadn't turned out so well.

Keep writing and good luck.

just started reading this story, I find it funny how you made Katara accept zuko faster than sokka, the show was opposite, although still a bit uncomfortable, sokka agreed to let zuko in first and didn't give him death threats. Good story keep going, though I don't really support Zutara or whatever I can deal with it since you are a good author.

I can't believe I've never read this story before! It's completely awesome. Very much a gen adventure fic, despite having some romance on the side.

I could go on about the major good things you did-- solid characters, exciting plot, fun dialogue, etc. But I really wanted to mention something smaller and more specific that impressed me-- your handling of Mai. Whether its true to the spirit of the character we won't know until the end, but I felt that your version of her was believable and well-written. I like the idea of her being Zuko's first vassal, and you subtly underplayed her attraction and possible feelings for him. They were very present in the undertones, but you (or she) never let them come to the forefront and introduce any sort of conflict. It's just a part of her, and her loyalty. We as readers never have to really wonder if Zuko would choose between Katara or the possibilities that Mai offers, because you never make it an issue, but the hint and the potential is there, and I like that. It ads layering to Mai and Zuko's character.

Ty Lee's final words about Sokka learning her technique were quite amusing, and dead-on, though Sokka might not see it that way.

You gave Jet a lot more faith and redemption than I do- I loved his character for being sociopathic, amoral, and obsessive, and craziness like that you don't easily grow out of. But you did an admiral job hinting at how he might have done self-examination to find the error of his ways, so I give you props for effort and commitment in your portrayal, even if I read the character differently.

Overall, great fic. Lots of action and plenty of good romance and friendship.

Just reviewing again since the last time I did it was around 2am and I didn't get everything in I wanted to say with the level of coherency I wanted. I thought this fic was so beautifully realistic and in line with the series that I really could imagine the animation taking the lines that you have. The character portrayals were so strong I could hear the voices of them while they spoke with your words, and the plotline worked wonderfully. If the show had taken a slightly different direction, this would have been it.

So thank you once more for an incredible read, and good luck with your future writing ventures.

This was an absolutely wonderful story. Your characterisations were brilliant. You even made me like Mai and Jet more, which I had always thought would be near impossible.

Thank you for all of your writing.

omg, so loved it, can't wait for the sequel that's comming. i hope you decide to write it soon, the agony of waiting.

Alyrenzia

That was an amazing story! Thank you for gracing us with your skill!

I really enjoyed the story revolving around Zuko - he's such an interesting character.

I also liked the little subconscious thoughts related to the tormenting waters and Zuko finally walking on to the 'beach' - as in he was resurfacing from his inner torment. That really added to the story!

Thank you for writing a very good story. I like your style of writing and throughly enjoyed every word. I am a little disapointed that you are not pursueing a sequel but who knows? Maybe some things that happen in the new season will give you some ideas about how to do things. However it is your descision on whay you do. I for one would enjoy a post war as well.

I'll be looking forward to your future works.

Very good chapter worthy of a review. i usually save it for the end of the story I am reading but I just wanted to say that I though your fight scenes were some of the best i have read in the Avatar fandom so far. I know I will enjoy the rest of your story. I like your depiction of Mai, and what she is saying about the people of the fire nation.