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| Sheng.Long 2008 2007-03-15 ch 1, | abuseThere are still some faults with the revised prologue, but nothing that can't be fixed by removing all the unneeded carriage returns and a few elementary 'automatic spellchecker' word errors... DON'T PEOPLE USE NOTEPAD WITH WORD WRAP ANY MORE?!? As for the story, You are abridging far too much. I'd have already written three chapters on the period you've rammed into one, and the original, which I just read, suffers from a lot of quick cuts and short-shrift writing. I know this is cruel, but it's true... You've assumed that the reader can fill in some huge blanks, and even I was left wondering what the hell was going on, and I know the universes... You don't need Street Fighter cameos... You need to make your chapters more substantial, or break up the story. |
| RanmaChaos 2007-03-13 ch 1, | abuseGood Chapter! Please continue to update!! |
| AshK 2007-03-13 ch 1, | abuseGreat start to this story! Keep up the great work! Sincerely, TO/BB P.S. Why did you decide to remake it? I'm just wondering! |
| Shinlong17349 2007-03-13 ch 1, | abuseLike the idea, I want to see were you take it sould be interesting. |