A great story. Very good.

B+. Sometimes it's a bit run-on, but other than that, great!

C-. Maybe B- cept you mispelled vial thus you lose a grade.
The tale seemed boreing to me but it is good enough true.
I suppose I just not type who likes this as some may do.
Feel not discouraged. You did very well. B- is still good.
Rather in this case C- due to need for a spell/grammer check.

Creativity - A
Humor - c
Wording - A+
Dialogue - A+

There, satisfied?