|Reviews for The Visitor|
| Vampire Reader 4/17/13 . chapter 1
I just found this. It is a little different from the sacrosanct MR version I am used to, but it is beautiful. I've read all of hers Alexander novels, and am used to thinking Bagoas loved Alexander boyishly at first, and as a man afterwards. When Hephaestion saved him, he finally understood that A&H were one, but I must say and just did, that your story shows another very-well told and believable alternate version. I'd rather believe B went to Egypt to be near his dear lord and serve his shrine, but I did enjoy this too.
| TheEndofTag 12/19/11 . chapter 1
wow!..this is just damn beautiful! i love the way how you captured Alexander's character in here. :)
| Baliansword 4/4/07 . chapter 1
*sigh* Beautiful. However, I think we should doubt the gods...taking away Hephaestion was just evil. I bet Aphrodite just wanted him for herself...grr.
| elizchris 4/1/07 . chapter 1
A lovely story, sorry I'm really, really slow on catching up on your stories, I'm really slow on everything. This one is bittersweet and tender. You give us an almost wistful Alexander and a Bagoas who seems more solid and less silly and absurd as he has been portrayed so often. I can't help but think he must have been a very skilled diplomat no matter what his physical attributes were. I like the way you wind up your story, and tie in Bagoas disappearance from the pages of history... who knows where he went. I like to think he really was with Aleaxander to the end and then maybe got to Egypt, I can see him, there I truly can, and not just because Mary Renault put him there in her "The Persian Boy." I'm waiting to get my energy up to read your long series which you were writing a while back. It's good to read your work.
| phai6688 4/1/07 . chapter 1
I love the last line. It made me feel so sad!
Awesome fanfic as usual!
| purple lolly 4/1/07 . chapter 1
| parisad 3/31/07 . chapter 1
Lovely story. Historical, as all your stories (beside some AU story) and well written. Your Bagoas is interesting and close to the historic character. And, I'm quite sure, Bagoas the dancer was NOT Bagoas the trierach. Ok, Coraldawn will kill me now, I know...but I'm going to post, as soon as I have time (LOL), the sources about Bagoas and to discuss this issue. I can hardly imagine a trierach DANCING. Beside, I doubt he was so affectionate to Alexander. Whatever. Coraldawn prepare your weapons ;)
Beautiful story, dear. I mailed you yesterday, finally :)
| CoralDawn 3/31/07 . chapter 1
I really love Bagoas here. I am fascinated by the historical Bagoas (I believe there was only one, dancing Bagoas trierarch Bagoas), and unfortunatley, one has not seen that character in film or published fiction. This Bagoas is so very interesting. Realistic, practical, intelligent, politically savvy, very affectionate to Alexander, settling down into his new Babylon home, and then at the end, sadly realizing that the end of everything is near, and he had better move along. Yes! This is the guy who served two Kings and survived a major change of power transfer at the Court. And thankfully no strange and highly modern "jealousy" for the dead Hephaistion at all, rather understanding how good that man had been for the future of the Empire. Honestly, though I sympathize with Alexander and his memories of Hephaistion here, and his own unique way of coping with his grief, Bagoas really held my attention in this story. In the end, I sympathized with him, and countless other Persians like him, who were about to face yet another major upheavable in their lives.
Also, as usual in your stories, I love the light, delightful humor threading through this one. "And then Hephaestion had stunned everyone, including Bagoas, by having the poor taste and equally poor timing to die". That's a classic!
| MLygia 3/30/07 . chapter 1
How is it possible to express so much sadness in such a beautiful way in a story so short? The description of the house, of Alexander's appearance, the reference to the rumors on Alexander's depressed behavior, his talk with Bagoas, all this is of an absolute precision. And my favorite part is the same of Joyee - I adored the pride and the happiness of Alexander when thinking in the envy that the others could have of him for being the owner of the love and of the body of Hepahestion. And you are right, we cant hate your Bagoas here, poor thing.
| kleos 3/30/07 . chapter 1
I've been following your story for a while now, but never got around to reviewing it. Didn't even have an account. Needless to say, your writing style flows so well, and even better, your stories always STAY TRUE TO HISTORY! You can't imagine how hard to find that combo is. I love the way you intertwine historical facts (which the Alexanderphiles like me lurve to pick up on) with wonderfully creative yet realistic imagination to fill in the gaps. This is really good historical fiction.
My personal favorite: Discord in Love. Had me clutching my side that was hurting from laughter. The ironic thing is that it was so typical of the ancient Greeks. There's always some god's work behind the mortals' actions.
My favorite line from this piece? "And then Hephaestion had stunned everyone, including Bagoas, by having the poor taste and equally poor timing to die just when Alexander’s plans and Alexander’s empire were both in a delicate state of transition."
Wonderful snarking from Bagoas, yet completely in line with what the historical Bagoas should have been after years at court: snarky yet practical enough to recognize H.'s position.
Great job! Keep up the good work!
| VivaLaQueen 3/30/07 . chapter 1
So sad yet wonderful! You truly capture Alexanders emotions and his personallity. We should have more Authors like you.
| Norrsken 3/30/07 . chapter 1
I always like a new story from is no exception. Your Bagoas shows both kindness and concern for his King. I also like it that he feels respect for *my* Hephaestion, and truly acknowledges his vital importance for Alexander. Your story is sad and foreboding - but all the same I like to pay a visit to Bagoas' house. He is pragmatic and knows what might happen to him and all of Persia when Alexander's days are reckoned...
All the best wishes,
| Joyeee 3/30/07 . chapter 1
Moon, I'm going to have to email you separately on this one, because it's just - difficult to write sensibly about this. (As you know I have an irrational fear of your A&H/death stories!) But let me just quote what is probably my favorite line here:
"not even Achilles possessed a body like Hephaestion’s… and I remember thinking, he is mine… and for a moment instead of wanting my men’s love, I wanted to feel their envy, I wanted them to hate me for having him, and to be able to… say to them… yes, cry, tear at your hair, scream… he’s mine… "
Also I think the last line was masterful! "He had grown fond of the house." - Yes, that would be his mindset! But put together with the rest of the story I think that bitterness he feels right then is also, partly, because he _has_ grown fond (so to speak) of Alexander. He's certainly not bound to either Alexander or Hephaestion by love, etc. but their being alive, ruling the empire, had offered him stability, and they hadn't been unkind to him, and I can't help but think that some of the surprise he feels at his bitterness conceals a certain regard for A (and by extension maybe, H) that perhaps even he doesn't realize.
Message following soon...
| thinkinabstract 3/30/07 . chapter 1
moon71, i have always loved your brilliantly wirrten stories and this is no exception. i adore your beautiful descriptions and the sweet melancholy here. at the moment, this is my new favorite. thank you for writing this; it had made my day!