|Reviews for Voice|
| Me 4/17/07 . chapter 3
First - I like the idea of Miss Parker following her innersense but you have a tendency to rush through your stories.
There is way too much dialogue and not enough 'set up' or descriptions. When you do it that way, the story loses something. You have to get the reader engaged in what you're trying to tell them - build it up a bit, add some tension. Make it a will she or won't she kind of scenario.
Also, in the "reality" of the TV show, I think Miss Parker would have wrestled with the decision to find J and ask for forgiveness. In fact, it would have taken a lot longer (or some really intense dreams) for her to even admit to herself that she needed his friendship.
Hope you don't take offense. I'm just trying to help.
| anamcharalove 4/16/07 . chapter 3
That was short and sweet. One problem. They just spilled their emotions like it was nothing. It would never have been that easy to say all of that. But it's your story, and I do like the thought that Miss Parker wants to be friends with Jarod and actually has the guts to let herself feel that.